Fake
by Owletta
Summary: After becoming an internationally famous singer, America Singer is ready to live her life as a normal girl again. As she struggles to remain hidden in Angeles High, a small Californian high school, she expects to be treated and to live like an average teenager. But, of course, things never happen the way you expect them to...
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, they all belong to Kiera Cass.**

 _Beep! Beep!_ The droning of my alarm clock pulled me from my nightmares. I shot up, a drop of sweat rolling down my head. Because today, I was taking a new step in my life: starting a new high school, just in time for the beginning of junior year.

As I smoothed down my jeans and plain striped shirt, I looked into the mirror. And finally, I didn't see the bruised face of a helpless victim of bullying: I was America Singer, the most popular international singer and wealthy enough to attend the most prestigious private school.

But in Angeles High, a small, unheard-of high school, I could try to be normal and act like myself. Not the celebrity America Singer, but your average, struggling teenage girl. And to accomplish that, all I had to do was plop on my blonde wing.

"America?" My youngest sister, May, giddily asked. My family had moved into a normal, small house just for me to attend a low-profile school. The thought brings tears to my eyes.

"I'm coming; just five more minutes!" I glanced into the mirror again. Wavy platinum blonde hair ran down to my waist, hiding my recognizable bright red hair. Perfect.

I rushed down the narrow stairs, grabbed my backpack, and shouted a hasty goodbye to my family, frantic to catch the bus. I found a seat on the bus next to a girl with golden curls.

"My name's Marlee, what's yours?"

I turned back, startled. My first interaction with a fellow student. She seemed cheerful and friendly at the same time.

"I'm Amer—Mer. Mer Singer," I replied hastily, smiling my mistake away.

"Wow! That's quite an unusual name, but I like it. Are you new here?" She eagerly chirped.

"Yeah. Mind if you help me around?" I asked as the bus screeched to a stop in front of Angeles High, Avalon, California. She energetically nodded, a movement that portrayed her personality.

The moment I picked up my schedule, she pounced on me, comparing our schedules. Surprisingly, we had everything except Math, Music, and Art together. She chatted the entire time during the walk to homeroom. I found myself liking her quite a lot.

"Oh, and here are my friends; I'm sure that you'll love them too!"

I cautiously stepped towards a small group of people. There was a compassionate looking brown-haired girl with brown eyes, a boy with blue eyes, a black-haired girl, and a dark-haired boy with the most striking green eyes.

Marlee was still rattling off. "See, that's Kriss," she said, pointing to the brown-haired girl. "And that's Carter. Oh, he's so cute!" Marlee gushed, sighing dreamily. I chose to ignore that. "That's Elise, and the green-eyed boy is Aspen."

 _Aspen._ Somehow, I couldn't stop thinking of him. Marlee had promised to introduce me to her friends at lunch, and I simply dreaded the wait. But the hours passed uneventfully, and soon Marlee was dragging me towards the cafeteria.

There they were, talking at a lunch table, smiling and laughing. Marlee held my hand, a comfort I was grateful for, and introduced me.

"This is Mer Singer, guys, she's really awesome!" This was met with warm smiles and welcomes.

I nervously smiled. "As you can see, I'm new here. And I consider myself successful not to have gotten myself lost here, although that's probably Marlee."

Everyone laughed. I graciously sat down, peeking over at Aspen. He caught my eye and winked, causing me to flush.

The cafeteria was noisy, and I wished to eat outside. But all of a sudden, the cafeteria quieted. Not to a faint murmur, even. Absolute silence. The doors slammed open and a squad of peppy cheerleaders strutted in. Followed by them were jocks, leering at the other students. And after them . . . a boy with too-perfect honey-colored hair and chocolate eyes walked in, with a cheerleader hanging onto his arm.

She had piercing light-brown eyes, rich, brown, diva-style curls, and a _lot_ of makeup on. I wondered how artificial this girl was. Even worse were her clothes. A skimpy cheerleader uniform barely managed to cover her body.

"That's Celeste Newsome. Super rich, bratty, slutty, and to be honest, a complete bitch." Marlee whispered. I just nodded. "And with her? Maxon Schreave. Total hottie, I know, but a player. He dates girls for about a week, then dumps them. He's this wealthy businessman's son."

I could care less about him and Celeste. I had absolutely no interest in him.

After lunch, Aspen walked over to me.

"So, Mer, huh?"

I blush again. "Yes."

"Do you want to come over to the café with me after school? You know, as friends." This time, he was the one who looked embarrassed.

Trying to sound nonchalant, I replied, "Sure."

* * *

The hours seemed to drag on, while I relentlessly looked forward to my "date" with Aspen. What really disappointed me was that we were only friends. Fixing my wig, I walked the short distance to the café. Aspen was already there, smirking at me. Eager to talk to him, I ordered a latte and boldly went to the table.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Blue, what's yours?" We had been asking each other random questions like this for hours. And I felt like I knew everything about him.

"Mine is green, I feel that it's the most vibrant color . . . how about your favorite singer?"

I froze up, before saying, "I don't know. You?" I had never considered that before, considering that I was a singer myself.

"America Singer. She's amazingly talented. Don't see much of that nowadays." Aspen had seemed to have not noticed that we shared the same last name.

I stood up suddenly. "Sorry Aspen, it's gotten late. I have to go back home, now."

"That's fine, Mer. See you tomorrow." He grinned and walked out of the café door after giving me a quick peck on the cheek. I stood there for a long time, looking back at where he had just left.


	2. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to the wonderful Kiera Cass!**

"I'm home!" I call. Silence. And then, I'm bombarded.

"Where were you, America? We've been worried sick about you! You were supposed to be home four hours ago!" My mom shrieks at me.

Gerad, the youngest in our family, pipes up. "America was probably at the recording studio!" I briefly shook my head, letting him know that I had been somewhere else. "Or in detention!"

My dad, who had just walked in, groaned. "Not again, America… not on the first day of school!"

"I know! She was with a _boy_!" May accuses, pointing her finger at me.

I sputter, "W-What? No!" This confirmed their beliefs. And in an instant, a ruckus really started to break out. Thank my lucky stars that Kenna and Kota aren't here to make it worse. Especially Kota.

I run upstairs to my room, where I slam my door shut. My phone beeps, causing me to look down at it. It was Aspen, sending me a message: _Are you home yet?_ I bit my lip, before replying: _Yes. And how did you get my number?_ He types back lightning-quick. _Marlee._

Of course. I set my phone down and stare out the window, before pulling out my guitar. Singing softly, I begin to compose a new song for my next concert. I know I should be in the basement, where all my professional music appliances are, or at my private recording studio.

The small bubble of peace was shattered when May barged into my room. "Is he cute? Please, I have to meet him!"

Startled, I said, "We went out as _friends._ Nothing more." Huffing, May stormed out.

At school the next day, I talked to my new friends. Kriss was sweet, with an elegant charisma.

"Hey. Kriss Ambers, right?" I grin, hoping to make light conversation.

"Yeah. Aspen is a great guy, by the way." She winked at me.

I laugh. "Do you like anyone?"

"No…" Is her short response. Her gaze is distant. Not wanting to touch further on the subject, I scramble over to Elise, who is just as friendly.

The ringing of the bell jerks all of us into a hurry. I scramble to Math, hoping I wouldn't be late. I dart in between people until I crashed into a girl.

"Oh, sorry—" I'm cut off by a snarling voice.

"Watch where you're going, whore!" _Celeste._ I open my mouth to respond, only to get cut off by a painful slap to the face. _Oh._

Flashback:

 _"Whore!"_

 _"Slut!"_

 _"Bitch!"_

 _The names I'm called in my freshman year in high school. Olivia glares down at me, a smirk darkening her sharp features. Her friend, Bariel, is the same. They continue to slap and kick and punch me, while I try to hide from their blows._

 _"Stop!" A voice._

 _Bariel and Olivia glance at me, afraid of getting into trouble. With one more look, they scurry off._

 _That was the day I left Carolina Province High. That was also the day my dad heard me singing in my room, the only thing that helped me through the torment of school. He immediately made us move to Avalon, California, and hired a crew to hit off my singing career._

I'm slapped back to reality. Literally. I run off, looking back at Celeste one last time.

Thankfully, I wasn't late. I quickly walk to my seat and start working on a math formula required for the AP classes. Halfway through the class, a boy walks in.

I recognize him. Maxon Schreave. Almost all the girls in the class swoon, batting their ridiculously long lashes and tossing their perfect hair. He strides toward his seat in the back, confidence leaking into his every step. Other boys look on jealously. And there's me, having no reaction at all towards Maxon Schreave.

The teacher notices, beaming with deviousness, obviously thinking of a punishment.

"You." She doesn't bother to address him by his name. "Come sit here with dear Mer, up in the front." Maxon looks untroubled. " _And_ you will be partners with her for your Statistics project." This time, he looks worried. The teacher sends me an apologetic look.

Maxon turns to look at me for the first time, but I don't look at him. When class ends, I'm the first one out of the door.

* * *

Aspen took me ice skating a week later. We're not afraid to admit that we're in a relationship now. I glide across the icy lake, laughing in joy. I do a few twirls, while Aspen slides across the frozen pond even more gracefully. I bask in the frosty sunshine until another couple joins us.

I know instantly the moment I see her. It's Celeste, and she's not alone. Maxon is with her, sitting quietly on a bench. She looks smug as she slips on her ice skates, before effortlessly gliding onto the ice.

I won't lie. Celeste was _good._ She did several pirouettes, completing an entire dance on the ice. When she's done, I clap softly for her.

"That was amazing!" But when I compliment her, she doesn't look pleased at all. Instead, she pushes me, and I fall. But it wasn't just any fall.

The thin ice beneath me, which I hadn't noticed before, cracks even more and shatters. I plunge into the icy lake, my body numb and unable to swim. For an earth-shattering minute, I choke for breath and sink even more.

Strong arms grab me by the waist and hoist me up. _Aspen._ I am relieved beyond measure as I tumble onto the thicker ice, looking into the eyes of my savior. My eyes meet warm chocolate ones. I choke. Maxon is drenched with freezing water, no doubt from saving me.

"W-why did you help me? I've never done anything for y-you." My teeth chatter from the cold.

"I don't know. Probably because then, I would have to do the entire Statistics project." He jokes, but I can tell that it isn't the real reason. I let it drop, though.

"Th-thanks."

"Anytime." For the first time, Maxon's perfect honey hair is messed up, slightly soaked. I smile a little.

Just when I start to wonder where Aspen is, Celeste stomps up to Maxon and drags him away, but not before roughly kissing him. I look away. I reach up to touch my own hair before realizing—my _wig._ Thankfully, it was undisturbed by the whole debacle.

I finally spot Aspen hovering near a few trees, setting up a picnic. _He had absolutely no idea._ I rush over.

"Wow, Mer. What did you do this time?" Aspen thinks that _I_ caused the entire disaster!

"It was Celeste. She pushed me, I slipped and fell, the ice broke, I nearly drown. See what happens when you aren't there?" My voice is sarcastic, rude even.

"Oh, Mer… I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that." His voice is sorry. I forgive him when he swoops down and kisses me gently. "How did you get out?"

"M-Maxon got me out." My shivers have renewed again.

Aspen's gaze darkens. "Don't trust Schreave. You know what he did last year? Natalie Luca. Sweetest, most innocent girl. But then, Maxon came and swept her off her feet. Dated for five days, he slept with her, then dumped her. Schreave had a new girlfriend the next day.

"She was devastated, Mer. Her grades dropped. She became a shell of who she used to be. And all we could do? Pick up the pieces. She never returned to her normal self. And towards the end of the year, she simply left the school."

I was speechless. I couldn't believe that _anyone_ could stoop so low. "Oh."

We ate lunch together in silence, me absorbing this new sliver of information. When I finished, I said goodbye to Aspen and left.

The next day at school, I chatted with Marlee, Elise, Kriss, Carter, and Aspen like nothing ever happened. My cheerful façade faded when I sat down in my seat for Math, next to Maxon.

"I can come over to your house this afternoon to work on our project," He offered.

I subtly nodded. "Of course."

The rest of the school day passed without consequence. And when I returned from school, I dreaded the ringing of the doorbell. But when it did, I hurried to answer it.

Maxon stood, hands in his pockets, shifting his weight from either foot. I slipped on my fake smile, made sure my wig was in place, and let him in.

Turns out that working with Maxon wasn't too bad. For an hour, we were sitting on opposite sides of my room, researching. But that all went downhill when Maxon found my radio and turned it on.

My voice was singing, clear and in tune, live at one of my previous concerts.

"Do you like America Singer?" Maxon's voice was curious.

I fumbled. "Uh, sure, she's okay, I guess. Do you like her?"

"What? She's got talent! Not to mention beauty…" His voice was awed.

I was disgusted. His true personality was showing. The boy who played with girls and broke their hearts. "Get. Out."

"Why?" Maxon was genuinely puzzled.

"I said, get. Out. Of. My. House!" My voice had barely concealed undertones of anger. Maxon seemed to hear it and slowly got up and walked out of my house. As his car backed out of my driveway, I started to feel regret for the first time.


	3. Chapter Three

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass!**

 **netanyar: Thank you so much!**

* * *

School was worse. My wig nearly fell off, Kriss and Aspen both seemed detached when I told them about what happened with Maxon yesterday, and even Marlee didn't seem that energetic. Well, until the Autumn Formal was announced.

"We have to go shopping, girls!" I knew that this meant that I would stand back and watch as Marlee tried to find something to impress Carter. Because I wasn't going to the dance.

The fateful Friday afternoon before the Fall dance arrived, girls were haunting department stores, looking for dresses. Unfortunately, I happened to be one of them.

"What about this one?" Marlee twirled in a short orange dress.

"No, it doesn't go well with your skin and hair," Elise commented.

"Oh, this one!" A cheery, long yellow dress embedded with tiny jewels set off her golden glow.

"It's perfect!" I smiled at her.

Kriss had mostly stayed silent the entire time, but added, "Elise, America, and I should pick out dresses too. After all, aren't we also going to the Fall Formal?"

Elise nodded, and I grimaced but also agreed upon seeing Marlee's excitement.

Kriss and Elise went off further into the department store while Marlee stuck with me.

"This one! Ooh, how about this one?" I sighed as Marlee found dresses and piled them into my arms. I spotted an elegant ice-blue dress and added it to my stack of dresses, before heading into the changing room.

"This is too much, don't you think?" I pointed to the skimpy black thing I was trying on.

Dress, after dress, after dress. I tried on at least fifty dresses! But the last one—the ice-blue one I had picked—really stood out. It was a floor-length dress with a modest neckline with blue sapphires, the only embellishments. Underneath the neckline was a small triangle slit in the middle. The dress swept out elegantly towards the floor with a low back that wasn't too revealing. It was perfect and simple.

Just then, the other girls walked out of the dressing room. Kriss chose an extravagant lavender dress, and Elise chose a traditional-looking red gown. When they saw me, they both squealed.

"Oh, Mer, that dress is beautiful! It really brings out your eyes," Kriss exclaimed with a small undertone I couldn't quite place—jealousy?

"You two have found beautiful dresses! You'll steal everyone's breath away." I beam.

The four of us returned to our respective homes quite happily. But for me, the happiness wore out Saturday evening. I had a friend come over to help me, Lucy, who was a nice and sweet girl my age and also helped me with my stage makeup before concerts.

"I'll apply makeup now," Lucy murmured after I slipped on my dress.

"Makeup?" I say disgustedly. I was no stranger to makeup, being on stage required it—but a small high school dance shouldn't need _makeup._

Wordlessly, Lucy applied light, natural makeup. I mentally thanked her for not doing much. After pinning up my fake blonde hair into a delicate updo, she quietly left, leaving me to wait for Aspen to pick me up.

I mentally made a note to purchase another, more inconspicuous car. I never drove my car around because it would shatter my fragile disguise of being normal. After all, a flashy Lamborghini is not what you see in small cities.

I heard the doorbell ring and ran downstairs to greet Aspen. "Hey," I whispered, breathless.

Smirking, Aspen held my hand and led me out to his car.

By the time we reached our school, the party was at full blast. I walked into the gym doors and was amazed by the transformation. Streamers, balloons, and fall-themed decorations hung everywhere. Without meaning to, I caught sight of Maxon hovering near the drinks, holding a vodka shot. Our eyes met for a fraction of a second, and I looked away.

Aspen had disappeared, and I wandered over to Marlee, who was sipping water. She was giggling with Carter, the two of them caught up in affection. I sighed and walked towards the side, where bleachers had once stood.

"Mer?" I knew it was Maxon before I even turned around.

"Yeah? What is it now?" I felt moody, and I happened to always take my feelings out on other people.

"Do you care to dance with me?" _Woah._ I blinked, making sure that I had heard correctly.

I ended up whispering, "Definitely."

I don't know how long we danced, but at the end, my feet were killing me. When I looked for Maxon again, I couldn't find him in the sea of people. I looked up and saw Aspen, eyes red-rimmed and the smell of alcohol oh his breath.

"Aspen, have you been drinking?" Obviously. A rhetorical question.

Aspen's words are slurred and aggressive, but I understand him. "I saw you with that bastard." _Oh no._

"Why do you care, Aspen? He's nice to me!" I defend.

"Because he's going to sleep with you and leave you heartbroken like he did to my sister and Natalie!" His sister? I had no idea.

My eyes widen. "A-Aspen, I'm sorry… I didn't know about your sister!"

"Kamber was permanently broken, Mer. Celia tried to help her, but the Kamber we knew was gone. All. Because. Of. Him! Stay away from him, Mer. You're _mine._ "

All of my regrets disappeared. "I'm not _yours._ I'm a person, you know, not your toy!" I stormed away from him.

I felt a tentative tap on my shoulder. I was _done._ "What?!" I shrieked, only to find myself face to face with Marlee.

Her brow puckered. "I was just trying to help, that's all! Jeez, Mer, you always take out your anger on others! What did we do to deserve your fury?" She walked away.

Wallowing in guilt and anger, I ran out of the gym, pulled out my phone—my real phone, not the one I use for my disguise—and dialed my private chauffeur. He didn't ask a single question as I harshly commanded him to take me home.

Once I was in the safety of my bedroom, I sobbed. I cried for hours and basked in the awful consequences of my bad decisions. And I'm afraid that it'll always be like this.


	4. Chapter Four

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass!**

I skipped school Monday. Instead, I headed over to the recording studio and recorded my new song. Here, I felt like I could let loose all of my worries in the world. My red hair fell down my back, finally rid of the blonde wig.

I unpacked my violin and let the music flow out, closing my eyes as I did so. I don't know how long I stayed there, playing my violin. When I was done, I took a cleansing breath and opened my eyes.

"Amazing, Miss Singer! Your recording went very well." My manager, Silvia, smiles warmly.

"Thank you. I'll be leaving shortly." I start to pack my instrument. Silvia looks at her clipboard and frowns. "What is it?"

"I'm sorry, Miss Singer, but you have a visitor today. In fact, he _purchased_ an opportunity to watch you record your songs."

I smile. "That's fine, Silvia, it's not a strange occurrence." It was true. Many fans got to watch me record my songs in my recording studio for a small fee. I usually gave the money from these special "backstage" passes to my recording crew and Silvia. "How many people?"

Silvia peered over her glasses, at the clipboard. "One. Schreave, Maxon. On his request, he claims that 'America Singer is an incredibly talented musician, not to mention she reminds me of a special girl in my school.'"

I internally groan. _Why, Maxon? How do I remind you of Celeste, of all people?_

On the outside, I play my fake laugh, as if it were a recording. "Wow! What a unique reason to see me record my songs."

"I hope it's okay for you to just sing, without recording, considering that you've just recorded all of your songs." _Right._

"Of course! When is he visiting?"

Silvia glanced at her watch. "Five minutes."

I instantly started scurrying around, hiding any pieces of information that might give away my disguise, dusting on a little makeup, and tidying up the studio. In a flash, those five minutes were over.

"Miss Singer? Your visitor has arrived!" Silvia's voice interrupts my panicking.

I compose myself, then walk to the entrance, where I see Maxon, dressed in a casual button-up shirt, and gray dress pants. But something's not right. He stands too rigidly, the hands in his pockets are too stiff, and even his voice is formal when he greets me, "Hello."

I slip on a smile that looks genuine. "It's fine, you can call me America. I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name?"

"Maxon. Maxon Schreave." He acts like I'm his business partner!

"No need for formalities, please. I'm just a normal girl who got lucky in the music industry!" I laugh, hoping that it would disguise my plead for him to act _normal._ However, I just needed to ask him a question. "So, I looked at your request before you came here. Who is this 'special girl' in your school?"

Maxon blushes a little, something I've never seen him do before. It intrigues me. "You wouldn't know her." _Well, I bet that I do!_ "She's breathtaking, but has quite the temper." He chuckles a bit. _Um, that fits the description of Celeste… but how am I like Celeste?_

The question continues to fill my mind as I unpack my guitar and violin while Maxon stares at a few pictures on the wall.

"Where'd you get this picture? I've seen it before," Maxon comments suspiciously.

It was a picture of May. Of course, I had the exact same picture at home, which Maxon had carefully examined when he came over to my house. _Why?_

I filter my response, making sure that I don't include any details but making my lie believable. "A friend thought that this girl was adorable, and sent the picture to me."

Maxon nodded, believing my flimsy attempt at a lie. "I see."

"I'm going to start singing now. You'll probably hear these songs at the concert, too."

Without any further comment, I strummed my guitar and began singing:

 _Fly – by Maddie & Tae_

 _"Baby blue staring in the window pane just counting drops of rain_

 _Wondering if she's got the guts to take it_

 _Running down her dreams in a dirty dress, now her heart's a mess_

 _Praying she will find a way to make it_

 _So keep on climbing, though the ground might shake_

 _Just keep on reaching, though the limb might break_

 _We've come this far, don't you be scared now_

 _'Cause you can learn to fly on the way down_

 _Searching for a sign in the night even like a lonely string of lights_

 _That'll burn just long enough for you to see it_

 _The road's been long and lonely and you feel like giving up_

 _There's more to this than just the breath you're breathing_

 _So keep on climbing, though the ground might shake_

 _Just keep on reaching, though the limb might break_

 _We've come this far, don't you be scared now_

 _'Cause you can learn to fly on the way down_

 _You won't forget the heavy steps it took to let it go_

 _Close your eyes, count to ten, hold your breath and fly_

 _Keep on climbing, though the ground might shake_

 _Just keep on reaching, though the limb might break_

 _We've come this far, don't you be scared now_

 _'Cause you can learn to fly on the way down_

 _Fly"_

I smile gently when I finish, then freeze. Maxon looks like he's been paralyzed. Finally, he relaxes.

"Wow…just wow. That was beautiful!" He looks lost in thought.

"Thank you," I say, wondering if he actually liked it.

I sing a few more songs for him before his session is over. By now, he seems absolutely smitten by my singing. I inwardly smirk. Celeste might be more beautiful than I am, but at least she can't sing.

* * *

School was just as boring as ever until Drama. The teacher looks positively giddy when we enter the classroom, Celeste is admiring her manicure, Marlee is jumping up and down in excitement, Kriss displays no emotion, and Maxon, who is right beside her, looks anxious.

Such a wide range of emotions. I really don't know what to feel, because the Drama teacher is known for assigning the worst projects, but Drama is also one of the most fun classes.

"Alright, students, every year, Angeles High broadcasts its very own musical! Now, I know that this isn't Music, but we'll be mostly grading you on your acting.

"Last year, we performed _Romeo and Juliet_ , and I have to say, that was disappointing. _No one_ got their lines completely correct! So, this year, I want to make our musical a little more interesting… _The Phantom of the Opera!"_ The Phantom of the Opera was a musical starring three main characters: Christine, the girl with a talent for singing, the Phantom, who haunted the opera with his hypnotizing voice, and Raoul, Christine's fiancee.

Everyone groaned, including me. "I know the high notes are hard to learn, but your Music teacher has also agreed to help you rehearse the musical!" Our teacher continued cheerily, oblivious to everyone's sulky mood. "Auditions are tomorrow, after school!"

She continued talking on and on for the rest of the class, handing us packets for the auditions. I looked at the lines. It included the "Angel of Music" scene, with the Phantom and Christine singing. Glancing around, I evaluated everyone's faces: Celeste looked confident, Marlee looked gloomy, Kriss had a hopeful expression, and Maxon also seemed as if he could master the auditions. And Aspen? His facial expression seemed… happy.

Honestly, I wasn't sure I could pull the auditions off. My dad said that I had the best voice in the world, but he also said that I was beautiful. Obviously, he had been lying a little. Celeste was talented in the areas where beauty and drama were concerned, and me? Just a small talent for singing and music.

The rest of the day passed without any concern, and when the auditions approached, I rehearsed my lines and braced myself for the worst partner. The teacher was going by alphabetical order, pairing boys with girls.

"Kriss Ambers with… Leeland Alberts." Kriss looks disappointed. Leeland was only known in our grade because of crying after a stressful competition. **(A/N: Leeland was part of Eadlyn's Selection, and after Eadlyn eliminated one-third of the boys, he started crying.)**

She continued until she got to the S's. "Mer Singer… with Maxon Schreave." Of course. How did I not see that coming? After about five more minutes, she finally got to the last pair.

"Elise Whisks with… Carter Woodwork." And with that, the auditions started.

Kriss was good. Leeland didn't do so bad himself. The only flaw in their performance was that when they sang, they didn't synchronize their singing, making the words sound jumbled. Celeste did a little better, but she added too much flair to her performance. And it felt like only a few seconds had passed before it was my turn.

Maxon and I stood at opposite ends of the stage. Maxon began singing, a rich baritone that imitated the rough, resonating voice of the Phantom.

" _Insolent boy, this slave of fashion_

 _Basking in your glory…"_

I wasn't sure how I did, but I knew that Maxon was definitely going to get the part of the Phantom. When auditions were over, Marlee jumped next to me and started squealing. "Mer! You did absolutely wonderful! I didn't know you could sing so well! And, you hit all the high notes that nobody else could do."

I laugh at her enthusiasm. "You were great, too! Don't downgrade yourself."

Marlee adopted a prophetic voice. "You, Mer Singer, will get the part of Christine Daae, while Aspen will get the part of the Phantom! It's a perfect love story."

Aspen didn't do bad, but he could've put more dramatic effects in his performance. I saw a flash of movement in the corner of my eye and realized that it was Kriss beckoning me over.

"Kriss?"

"Yeah. I want to talk to you privately." She sounds a little angry.

"Sure," I quickly join her. "What do you want to talk about?"

"You did good, but I really want the part of Christine. I've never been in a major role in anything, and you're always the best at everything. So, please, if you're chosen for the role of Christine and I'm the backup, could you let me have it? Christine's role, I mean."

I was shocked. How could she demand me to hand over something I worked so hard at? Even if I didn't particularly want the major role, I would still enjoy playing it! "Kriss, I don't know… this isn't something you would want to give away."

"Whatever. I knew that you would be too selfish to let me have it." Kriss's voice was bitter, with hints of anger and sadness. "Keep this conversation secret." She walked away.

What happened to the sweet, kind Kriss? I felt bad. In those few seconds, I made up my mind to hand her the role, regardless how I felt. I wanted to do what was moral, and that was sticking to the teacher's decisions and judgment, but I didn't want to betray Kriss's trust. So I sat by the fountain for hours, not knowing what was right, and what was wrong.


	5. Chapter Five

**Disclaimer: Kiera Cass owns all of the characters!**

It had come to the time where the roles were being announced. By the time I reached Drama, everyone was already there, chatting excitedly and making bets on who would be the Phantom and Christine. I heard snippets of conversation, including Maxon's and Celeste's name, or Maxon's and Kriss's name.

On the other hand, our Drama teacher looked nervous. "Hush now, everyone, we've got roles to announce! I'll start with the minor characters, then finish with the lead roles.

"For the character Meg, Marlee Tames! Congratulations, Marlee! And for Madame Giry, we have…" She droned on and on, while I waited to hear Kriss's or Celeste's name.

Celeste was announced as Carlotta, the opera singer from Spain who despises Christine. "I'll announce the backups after we reveal the leads! As Raoul, Aspen Leger. Good job, Aspen! Your audition was amazing. And, the Phantom of the Opera, Maxon Schreave!"

Our Drama teacher looked at Maxon warmly, an expression reserved for her star pupil. "Maxon, dear, you were absolutely astounding! You blew me away. And his audition, students, is an example of how it _should_ look like…"

I tuned out her praises and compliments for Maxon. About what seemed like an hour later, she finally got back to revealing the roles. Kriss was looking at me, a smug expression perched on her face as if she _knew_ she was going to be Christine.

"Christine Daae, the main female lead, goes to… Mer Singer!" I fell off of my chair. Kriss's jaw dropped. "Mer… I don't know what to say. You put so much emotion into your character, you made it _real._ The singing was absolutely perfect, every high note! And you and Maxon work perfectly together.

"Mer's backup will be Kriss Ambers, and Maxon's backup will be Carter Woodson. The backup for Raoul will be Leeland Alberts. That's it! Now, for those of you who didn't get picked, there's always next year! Class is dismissed."

The moment I was out of the suffocating classroom, Kriss cornered me. "Mer, forget about yesterday," she encouraged. "I don't know what I was thinking. I probably just had a bad day."

I hugged her. "I don't care. Honestly, our friendship is better without the competition."

Kriss smiled. "You're the best friend ever!" After one last hug, she headed off towards her next class, leaving me to muse over my thoughts as I headed towards Music.

Thankfully, none of my friends shared this class with me. I was called to the front of the class to sing a couple of scales, but that was it. The teacher particularly hated me. "Mer Singer, come up here and redo that scale!"

I begrudgingly sang my scale over again, thirsting to get out of school.

* * *

"Mom! A classmate's coming over to finish our Statistics project!" I called once I got back home.

"Okay, honey, you don't have to lie to me, do you have a musical?" I fixed my wig and groaned. How did she know?

"Yes, mother, I do. And I got the lead role." My voice was monotone.

"Perfect, darling! It's about time you show your talent to the school." When she said that, I stomped away.

Maxon came over about an hour later, and we finished our project.

"My friend's going to pick me up in about an hour." _He didn't drive here?_

"Got it. What do you want to do?" Maxon looked at me when I said that.

His eyes suddenly narrowed to chocolate slits. "Your singing. It sounds familiar…" I mentally cursed. _Shit!_

"I don't know. Perhaps you've heard me sing before?" I suggested, on the edge of panic. _No, stupid! America, you weren't supposed to lose your disguise to Maxon!_

"No…" But he dropped the subject. "Well, we can practice our lines together…"

That seemed like a great idea at the moment. "Sure! Let me find my lines." I scrambled around my room, searching for that stupid packet.

We ended up practicing the entire time. Half an hour into our rehearsing, I went downstairs and grabbed beers for both of us. As it was, the two of us were now a little more than tipsy. Maxon messed up on one of his Phantom parts _again,_ causing us both to convulse into laughter.

When I finally sobered up, I found Maxon's face precariously close to mine. Uncomfortable, I pushed him away. I had another sip of beer before I started attempting the "Masquerade" dance. Maxon offered to be my dancing partner, and I gladly accepted.

He twirled me around like a professional while I stumbled around ridiculously. After another twirl, Maxon pulled me to his chest. I stared up at him. And in a drunken moment, I closed the distance between our lips.

His lips tasted like heaven. I pulled him closer to me like someone else was controlling my body. He pushed us towards my bed, taking control of the kiss. I was just thinking, _He's a damn good kisser! No wonder Celeste wants to kiss—_ my thoughts were cut off when I remembered: Aspen.

I broke away abruptly. Already I was missing the feel of his lips on mine, but I pushed those thoughts aside. I was angry at myself for starting the entire scenario. "I c-can't. I have a boyfriend, Maxon."

With his hair messed up, and lips swollen, I found him impossible to resist. "Sorry, Mer. I don't know what I was thinking."

"It's my fault. Maxon, you also have a girlfriend. Don't cheat. You should g-go." A car was parked next to my house, presumably his friend's.

With one last longing look at me, he left, taking with him all of my dreams.


	6. Chapter Six

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to the lovely Kiera Cass!**

 **Guest: Thank so, so, so, so much! You don't know how much your enthusiasm motivates me. :)**

"I'm thinking that we should host a performance for the students at Angeles High," Silvia says, her condescending eyes glaring down at me as if to say, _Don't challenge me._

We were in the recording studio, brainstorming ways to do a free, public performance. And of course, Angeles High was the only high school in our small city of Avalon.

"That sounds perfect. When?" My voice wavers a bit, showing how much I don't want to do it.

"Tomorrow, twelve o'clock p.m. sharp. I've already planned it."

Obviously. Like I need a reason to sing in front of the entire school. I'll just have to skip school tomorrow.

I spent the morning before the concert rehearsing my songs, having my attendants getting me into concert attire and layering my face with concert makeup.

I peeked out of the long red curtains on the stage, looking at the crowded auditorium. Everyone was already there. I could see Maxon's and my friends' faces clearly, given that they were sitting in the front row, looking expectant.

"Alright, Miss Singer, you're ready! Going live in 3…2…1!"

I walk out, my fake smile beaming at the audience. I wait for the cheering to die down as I've been trained. "Hello! My name is America Singer, although you've probably heard of me before. I'll be singing a couple songs from my last concert because you'll have to listen to my new songs at my next concert, which is the week after next.

"I'm going to start with a song named 'Little Do You Know.'" I had picked out this song specifically for Maxon.

 _Little Do You Know – Alex and Sierra_

 _"Little do you know  
How I'm breaking while you fall asleep  
Little do you know  
I'm still haunted by the memories  
Little do you know  
I'm trying to pick myself from piece by piece  
Little do you know  
I need a little more time  
Underneath it all, I'm held captive by the hole inside  
I've been holding back  
For the fear that you might change your mind  
I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight  
Little do you know  
I need a little more time_

 _Away, away  
I love you like you've never felt the pain, away  
I promise you don't have to be afraid, away  
The love you see right here stays so lay your head on me  
Little do you know  
I know you're hurt while I'm sound asleep  
Little do you know  
All my mistakes are solely drowning me  
Little do you know  
I'm trying to make it better piece by piece  
Little do you know  
I, I love you till the sun dies_

 _Away, just wait  
I love you like I've never felt the pain, just wait  
I love you like I've never been afraid, just wait  
Our love we see right here stays so lay your head on me_

 _Away, away  
I love you like you've never felt the pain, away  
I promise you don't have to be afraid, away  
The love you see right here stays so lay your head on me  
Lay your head on me  
So lay your head on me  
'Cause little do you know  
I love you till the sun dies…"_

I could see Maxon's gaze locked firmly on me when I finished. "The next song is called 'Stand by You.'"

 _Stand by You – Rachel Platten_

 _"Hands, put your empty hands in mine  
And scars, show me all the scars you hide  
And hey, if your wings are broken  
Please take mine so yours can open too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Oh, tears make kaleidoscopes in your eyes  
And hurt, I know you're hurting, but so am I  
And love, if your wings are broken  
Borrow mine so yours can open too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you_

 _Even if we're breaking down, we can find a way to break through  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you_

 _Yeah, you're all I never knew I needed  
And the heart, sometimes it's unclear why it's beating  
And love, if your wings are broken  
We can brave through those emotions too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Oh, truth, I guess truth is what you believe in  
And faith, I think faith is helping to reason  
No, no, no, love, if your wings are broken  
Borrow mine so yours can open too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you_

 _Even if we're breaking down, we can find a way to break through  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you_

 _I'll be your eyes when yours can't shine  
I'll be your arms, I'll be your steady satellite  
And when you can't rise, well, I'll cry with you on hands and knees  
'Cause I  
(I'm gonna stand by you)_

 _Even if we're breaking down, we can find a way to break through (come on)  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'm gonna stand by you  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you  
Love, you're not alone  
No, I'm gonna stand by you  
(Even if we can't find heaven, heaven, heaven)  
I'm gonna stand by you."_

Cheers erupt as soon as I finish. I grin, announcing, "And this last song is 'Pompeii!'"

 _Pompeii – Bastille_

 _"I was left to my own devices  
Many days fell away with nothing to show_

 _And the walls kept tumbling down  
In the city that we love  
Grey clouds roll over the hills  
Bringing darkness from above_

 _But if you close your eyes  
Does it almost feel like  
Nothing changed at all?  
And if you close your eyes  
Does it almost feel like  
You've been here before?_

 _But if you close your eyes  
Does it almost feel like  
Nothing changed at all?  
And if you close your eyes  
Does it almost feel like  
You've been here before?_

 _Nothing changed at all  
Nothing changed at all_

 _We were caught up and lost in all of our vices  
In your pose as the dust settled around us_

 _And the walls kept tumbling down  
In the city that we love  
Grey clouds roll over the hills  
Bringing darkness from above."_

After I finish, I yell, "I'm answering questions now!" Many hands go up. "You there, in the back."

"Do you like being famous?" A timid-looking boy asks me.

I laugh. "Oh, it's definitely fun at times, but sometimes, I miss my life before I became popular." I look at the front row and am surprised to see that Maxon's hand is raised. "Maxon?"

Murmurs instantly pop up, while I realize my mistake. _America, America, why did you have to address him by his name?!_ Now everyone knows that I know Maxon personally, who was currently smirking.

"Is there a specific reason why you chose those songs?" _Woah._ I wasn't expecting _that._ Might as well be truthful.

"Yes. In fact, I picked them for someone special," I purse my lips.

Maxon doesn't look satisfied, but he sits back in his chair, letting go of the topic. Kriss raises her hand. Making sure that I don't repeat my mistake, I beckon towards her. "You?"

"Have you ever had a crush? If so, how did you deal with it?" My brows furrowed. Why would she ask about a topic that had nothing to do with my career?

"Yes, I did have a crush. He has the most startling green eyes. And, if a boy doesn't like you for your personality, then he isn't worthy of your feelings. Asp—My crush is my boyfriend now. But I don't think we'll work out. We have too many arguments. If you and your crush don't get along, that means that there's someone else better for you."

Aspen and I hadn't talked for over a week. There was too much space between us right now. I sighed, realizing that I had gotten too intimate during a public performance. The questions continued for another hour, me tirelessly answering queries. And as soon as the interrogations were over, I darted off of the stage, ready to go home.

* * *

The next day at school, I was nervous. I never get frightened when I go on stage, but I'm scared of breaking up with someone? _Chill, America!_ I grew even more anxious as I made my way down to the cafeteria. Across the room, I could see Maxon eyeing me.

I finally spotted Aspen laughing at our table. I hurriedly walked up to him. "Could we speak privately?"

Aspen quickly sobers up. "Okay," he says as I lead him just outside of the cafeteria. "What is it?"

My eyes tear up a little. "I don't think we'll work anymore, Aspen. We're not _right_ together."

But to my utmost shock, Aspen hugs me. "Don't cry, Mer. And you know what? I agree. There was no _future_ for us. But you can accomplish that with someone else. I think we get along better as friends."

I smile. "Oh, Aspen, you're wonderful. Thanks for understanding."

He grins back. "Anything for you. We should get back to the cafeteria. I'm hungry."

We walk back to the cafeteria in comfortable silence. When lunch period ended, Marlee attacked me. "What did you talk to Aspen about?"

"I broke up with him." My answer is short and straight to the point.

"Oh. You two have been distant recently." Even Marlee had sensed the space between Aspen and I this past week.

We parted ways, and I headed to Math. The entire class, including the teacher, stared at me as I entered, ten minutes late. I could see my Math teacher glaring at me judgmentally. Maxon raised an eyebrow once I shamefully slid into my seat.

He pressed a note into my hand. _You should have seen America Singer's concert here yesterday. I don't even know why you were absent yesterday, and tardy today. Care to fill me in?_

I discreetly write on the back of his paper. _I was sick yesterday. And today, I got a little carried away during lunch._

Maxon gives me an imperceptible nod after reading my note. I felt bad for lying to him again. He sees some shadow of the guilt in my eyes, and whispers, "Want to talk about it? I can come over to your house today."

And without even thinking about it, I whispered back, "Yes."


	7. Chapter Seven

**Disclaimer: Well, I'm still not Kiera Cass! She owns all of the characters!**

 **A shout-out to all of my reviewers so far: (In order from oldest to newest)**

 **netanyar: Thank you for being the first reviewer. Honestly, I don't know how to express all of my gratitude.**

 **Guest: Thanks! Your compliments really make my day!**

 **Guest: I really appreciate that you actually like this!**

 **Guest: Aww, thank you! That's so sweet!**

 **TheElite: Wow, is it really? I'm still wrapping my head around the idea of people actually** ** _liking_** **this, a random thing I envisioned in my head.**

 **Guest: Eek, thank you!**

 **Bellelove: Don't worry, I will!**

 **StarryEyes: Wow! I ship Maxerica a lot, too!**

 **Your reviews keep me motivated to post multiple chapters a day! Sadly, all I have right now is this lame filler chapter. It does have a bit of Maxerica and a small Celeste moment. :D**

* * *

When Maxon dropped by my house and rang the doorbell, May was the one to answer it. Unfortunately. She squealed, the sound piercing my eardrums. "Ames! Who is _this?_ " I rushed towards the door, the panic obvious in my eyes.

"May, you aren't supposed to call me Ames _or_ America! It's Mer, remember?!" I hissed in her ear.

"Oh, right!" The innocence in her eyes made me forget all about getting angry. "Sorry, Mer." She uses my fake name.

Maxon watches the exchange quietly, his eyes never leaving me. May stares up at him in wonder. I snap irritatedly, "That's Maxon. And no, he's not my boyfriend." May seemingly deflates and floats somewhere else.

I lead Maxon into my room, blushing as I remember what happened the last time we were here together. I don't even know why, but I blurt out, "I broke up with Aspen today."

He looks strangely satisfied. "Oh. So, do you want to talk to me? You seemed kind of troubled during Math."

"Some issues with Aspen. It's nothing," I lie, averting my eyes so that I wouldn't have to look at him.

"Come on, Mer. You can talk to me." He encouraged. "I'll be your confidant."

I decide on the topic I want to approach Maxon about the most. "There are reasons I stay away from you, Maxon. Th-there are rumors. Rumors that you date a girl for one week. Rumors that you toy with girls, using them for your bedroom activities. That's c-cruel, Maxon!"

He freezes, a sad, empty look taking place. "I'm sorry, Mer. I just don't want to ever fully commit to someone."

"Then why sleep with them? Where is your morale?!"

"It helps take my mind off the stress of things. And most of the girls I sleep with are just nasty."

I give him a disgusted look. "That's not an excuse to break their hearts. And don't use girls to relieve your own problems! Have you ever thought of how they felt? How crushed they are when they see through your charm?"

Maxon looks desperate by now. "Please, Mer, I'm not like that! Just give me a chance."

I was about to say something I was going to regret when he smashed his lips on mine. I don't know what came over me. I tangled my fingers through his honey blond hair and pulled him closer to me. I was encapsulated in this small bubble of euphoria with Maxon, and I would have been content to stay there forever.

And at the worst moment possible, May barged in through my bedroom door. Her large blue eyes widened at the sight of Maxon and I jumping apart, hair messed up and lips swollen. "You said that there was nothing going on!"

"May, I, uh…." I was at a loss for words. "Don't mention this to Mom, okay? And I'll let you interrogate him. Deal?"

She jumped up and down, a wide grin taking over her face. "Deal!" Then, turning to her next victim, she stroked her chin, thinking of questions. I backed out of the room and retreated to the basement.

My face flamed when my mind accidentally traveled to our recent make-out session. To distract myself, I practiced my piano.

I headed upstairs again. As I made my way to my room, Maxon walked out, face entirely red from blushing. "What did she talk about?"

His face reddened further. "I'd rather not say."

I cracked my bedroom door open. May was sitting on my bed, looking smug. She narrowed her eyes at me, letting me know that she was watching the two of us.

"You should go."

Wordlessly, he left, brushing his hand on mine for a second before walking out the door. Sighing, I was left on my own once again.

* * *

After I got off the bus, I ran up to Kriss and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around, surprised, then saw that it was me. "I don't want to talk right now, Mer."

Rejected, I headed towards the courtyard. In the distance, I heard faint sobbing. Confused, I looked around. The fountain. A figure was sitting on the edge, crying softly. I slowly approached them, then realized that it was a girl. But not just any girl. It was Celeste. And she was _crying._

No matter what she had done in the past, I was still human. "What's wrong? You can tell me."

Celeste looked up, her eyes puffy and makeup smeared. "I don't need your fake sympathy, Singer. I'm perfectly fine on my own."

"Seriously, Celeste. You don't always have to act strong. It's okay to break down sometimes. And you have to let loose occasionally," I say, my voice gentle.

She breaks down. "M-my mother died! She left me, with nothing but an alcoholic father! She was _everything_ to me…"

I didn't know how that felt, losing a loved one, but I tried. "It'll be fine. Just remember that she'll always be watching you, wishing you luck."

"It's not just that. Maxon—h-he abandoned me! He broke up with me this morning after I told him that my mom died. He left me when I needed support the most, Mer! My so-called friends, too! After I explained everything to them, they took _joy_ in the fact that I was being brought down."

I was infuriated. How could people be so heartless? How could Maxon do this, of all people? "Well, that'll never happen. Because I'll help you, Celeste. I don't care about what happened in the past, what matters is that we fix it." And to prove my point, I hugged her.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Because everyone deserves a second chance."

I could feel everyone's stares as I led Celeste to her homeroom. "Bye, Celeste." She nodded her thanks. And I realized: Being cruel and nasty will get you nowhere. It will never satisfy you completely. But helping someone else? It fills you up with pride and joy. And I resolved to do just that: Forgive and forget.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Disclaimer: Kiera Cass owns all the characters, not me!**

Our Drama teacher was getting excited about the musical. "Listen up, today we'll have a rehearsal and see how that goes, okay?"

Turns out, we didn't do that bad. Everyone stumbled on their lines a bit, but other than that, it went smoothly. Aspen didn't have to fake his discomfort as Raoul when he watched the Phantom try to make Christine fall in love with him.

The only awful part of the musical was "The Point of No Return" scene because Maxon kept touching me, and it involved an awful lot of seducing. I carefully monitored Aspen's face as Maxon pulled me close to him, his breathing labored. Aspen's face was slightly angry and a little disturbed, but he didn't do anything.

During lunch, I motioned Celeste over to come sit with me, which caused mixed responses. Marlee looked happy, while Aspen was the opposite. He sulked quietly the entire time. Kriss complained a little but eventually gave in. The others were welcoming, and Elise even braided Celeste's hair!

Math was better. I breezed through the quiz, Maxon finishing it even before I did. "Hey," he whispered after we passed our quizzes to the teacher.

"Hi?" I say, confused.

"Will you, Mer Singer, got out with me tonight?" Poor Maxon looks like a bundle of nerves.

I grin. "Of course! Why wouldn't I?" I laugh loudly.

The teacher shoots the two of us a glare. "Mer Singer and Maxon Schreave, detention for talking in the middle of a quiz. After school." It was all I could do to keep from laughing.

* * *

"So, what do you like to do?" Maxon and I were sitting in an empty classroom, all our detention worksheets laid out and finished. Hey, no one said anything about splitting up the work, right?

He blushed. "I enjoy taking pictures. And, you know…" He trails off.

I raise my eyebrows. "Having sex?"

He blushes again. "I guess. And reading. I love reading." Wow. What a variety of hobbies. "What do _you_ like to do?"

I smile. "Singing. I like singing. Playing the piano, violin, and guitar. Guitar goes well with singing. And eating strawberry tarts." I laugh, thinking of delectable strawberry tarts.

If someone had told me a month ago that I would be sitting in detention with Maxon and making friendly conversation with him, I would laugh in their face. But here I was.

Maxon looks indecisive about something, and finally blurts, "Who was your first kiss?"

It doesn't take me long to remember. "In eighth grade, I went to a party. A drunk stranger," I laugh at the ridiculousness. "Who was _yours?"_

He frowns. "I don't remember. An eighth-grade party for me, too. I was drunk. And she was a redhead."

I grimace. Who knew we were tied in so many ways? "Oh…"

A bored-looking teacher walks in. "You two can leave now. Your time is up." He collects our worksheets and leaves. Maxon takes my hand and leads me to his car, a flashy orange affair. He's wealthy, too.

"You aren't going to ask about Celeste?" He looks at me curiously.

"No. I found her crying at the fountain. Jeez, I wonder why!" I say sarcastically, angry again.

"I didn't want to continue the relationship. I wanted to be with you," Maxon says earnestly, looking at me.

It made me feel horrible all over again. How long could I keep up this disguise? "Really?" Ever since I became famous, I was terrified of getting into a relationship with someone. Did they want America Singer, the rich and famous pop star, or America Singer, the girl who just wanted to keep her family safe and pursue her dreams?

Maxon's eyes were tender, and his lips were inviting. "Yes, I did. And I still do. I like everything about you, from your charming remarks to your blonde hair." He parks his car and gets out, going to the other side to help me out.

A small tear dripped down my cheek. Here Maxon was, spilling his heart out to me, to a girl that didn't even exist. I swiped at my face and composed myself. I try to smile, forcing my eyes to crinkle. "I might like you too."

The hope on his face is impossible to hide. Maxon leads me to… my own recording studio. I blanch. How was I going to pull this off? I feign confusion. "Where are we?"

"America Singer's recording studio. I never knew that she had a recording studio here, of all places. I thought that you would like to hear her sing because her concert is weeks away."

"Oh, um… you don't have to take me _here._ Any restaurant or theater would have been fine."

But Maxon is insistent. "No, I already purchased the passes! We have to go."

I smile happily on the outside, but inside I'm crying in desperation. "Wow! I'm excited to hear her sing. I've heard that she's talented."

When we enter the building, I see Silvia standing there with her clipboard. "Mr. Maxon Schreave and Miss Mer Singer?"

Maxon nods politely. "Yes."

I hurriedly gasp, "Err, Maxon, I have to use the restroom…"

He shrugs. "I'll meet you back here, then." I nod, then run to my dressing room.

I find Lucy timidly organizing the room. "Lucy? Lucy! I need you to do something for me." She looks enough like Mer Singer, complete with the blue eyes. I rip the wig off my head. "Here, wear this. There's a boy waiting outside my practice room, pretend that you're a headstrong girl named Mer Singer, and act affectionate towards him. I have to go."

For once, I prepared Lucy. She doesn't exactly look like me, but that was all I had. I raked my hands through my hair and directed her towards Maxon. He embraces her. I can hear him talking. "Mer, you look a little nervous, it's okay…"

I run towards my practice room and attempt to wipe away my nervous sweat. I unpack my guitar in jerky motions. This _had_ to work. Maxon and Lucy enter, hand in hand. Well, more like Maxon was gripping Lucy's hand, while Lucy was totally lost on how to respond. "Hello, Maxon. Pleased to see you again. Who do you have with you?"

He grins softly. "This is Mer Singer." His smile drops once he compares our last names.

Lucy's eyes are scared. "Happy to meet you, Miss Singer."

"Without further ado, I'll start with a song called 'Silent Scream.'" I was silently screaming myself.

 _Silent Scream – Anna Blue_

 _"I'm caught up in your expectations,_

 _You try to make me live your dream._

 _But I'm causing you so much frustration,_

 _And you only want the best for me._

 _You're wanting me to show more interest,_

 _To always keep a big bright smile._

 _Be that pinky little perfect princess,_

 _But I'm not that type of child._

 _And the storm is rising inside of me,_

 _Dontcha feel that our worlds collide?_

 _It's getting harder to breathe,_

 _It hurts deep inside._

 _Just let me be,_

 _Who I am._

 _It's what you really need to understand,_

 _And I hope so hard for the pain to go away._

 _And it's torturing me,_

 _But I can't break free._

 _So I cry and cry but just won't get it out,_

 _The silent scream._

 _Tell me why you're putting pressure on me,_

 _And every day you cause me harm._

 _That's the reason why I feel so lonely,_

 _Even though you hold me in your arms._

 _Wanna put me in a box of glitter,_

 _But I'm just trying to get right out._

 _And now you're feeling so so bitter,_

 _Because I've let you down._

 _And the storm is rising inside of me,_

 _Dontcha feel that our worlds collide?_

 _It's getting harder to breathe,_

 _It hurts deep inside._

 _Just let me be,_

 _Who I am._

 _It's what you really need to understand,_

 _And I hope so hard for the pain to go away._

 _And it's torturing me,_

 _But I can't break free._

 _So I cry and cry but just won't get it out,_

 _The silent scream._

 _Can't you see,_

 _How I cry for help._

 _cause you should love me,_

 _Just for being myself._

 _I drown in an ocean,_

 _Of pain and emotion._

 _If you don't,_

 _Save me right away._

 _Just let me be,_

 _Who I am._

 _It's what you really need to understand,_

 _And I hope so hard for the pain to go away._

 _And it's torturing me,_

 _But I can't break free._

 _So I cry and cry but just won't get it out,_

 _The silent scream._

 _My silent scream."_

Lucy and Maxon clap politely when I finish. Maxon, ever the gentleman, compliments, "That was beautiful, A-America." He stumbles a bit saying my name so casually. Lucy, being used to my singing, just smiles at me. Maxon's brows furrow as he whispers in her ear.

Lucy's face turns a little pale from worry and says out loud, "I think Miss Singer already knows my gratitude."

Maxon doesn't even bother to whisper this time. "Mer, are you okay? You're acting a bit strange."

I make a signal at Lucy. _Kiss him,_ it represents. A drop of sweat rolls down her forehead as she turns her head and kisses Maxon squarely on the lips. He seems to melt a little and relaxes, though not all the tension in his body fades away. I feel a claw digging into my heart as I watch them, even though I basically set up the entire thing.

Maxon notices me. "Oh, sorry…I guess I just got carried away. Continue, please."

Feeling sick, I manage to force out a few more songs from my throat. Once I'm done, I motion Lucy to follow me. Maxon, dazed, follows Lucy out. I had to throw him off. I saw the Women's Restroom and darted inside, Lucy right on my heel. I waited for a few moments before slipping into my dressing room.

"Lucy, I don't know how to thank you. You saved my life!"

"Miss, would you be bothered if I asked you why?"

So I spilled. I told everything to Lucy. How I hid behind a wig and a fake identity, how Maxon became attracted to me, how he wanted to take me here for a date. "That's quite a mess you've gotten yourself into," Lucy giggles at last.

"Yeah," I reply distantly, thinking about the oblivious Maxon waiting for me outside the Women's Restroom. Lucy takes off the wig and adjusts it onto my head, tucking every last red strand away. I walk out of the dressing room and walk up to Maxon.

"I'm back!" I grin brightly. He sighs and leads me to his car.

Maxon isn't smiling. "Mer, what happened back at the recording studio? It was like you were another person!"

I knew this was coming. "I honestly have no idea. What did I do?"

But he isn't paying attention. Instead, he flings himself at me, roughly kissing me. And when I look into his eyes and push myself away, I see dark, brooding lust in them. It scares me. "Maxon, stop. Please don't."

Maxon blinks a few times. "Sorry, Mer, I'm so sorry. I don't know what went over me. It won't happen again." And I believe him.

"Where are we going now?"

"A restaurant. I want you to tell me about your life before you came to Angeles High."

When we arrive at the elite French restaurant, I smile at Maxon as he takes me inside. We're brought to a table for two. Maxon looks at me expectantly, and I begin fabricating a few lies.

"Well, as you already know, I had my first kiss in eighth grade. For my freshman and sophomore years, I went to Carolina Province High." I started out truthfully, only lying about the sophomore year part. I had a private tutor for my sophomore year in high school.

"And, let's just say that I wasn't exactly popular in my freshman year. During my sophomore year, I gained popularity. A lot. My singing was a big thing." Well, I was actually bullied in my freshman year. In my sophomore year, I became famous.

"Then, I moved here. Why? Because I wanted to," I joke. "What about you?"

Maxon scratches his neck, uncomfortable. "I also had my first kiss during eighth grade, with a pretty girl who had red hair. And that very same year, my mother wanted us to move from Carolina to Avalon for a quiet life. So, we did. And I've been at Avalon High ever since. During my freshman year, I attracted a girl named Bariel Pratt, who was here on vacation.

"Well, after she left, I started rapidly dating girls. I couldn't find one that liked me beyond my looks and popularity. Did they even know that I like photography? No. And soon, I found that I just couldn't commit to anyone. I began using them for myself, to take my mind off issues at home. But I plan to stop doing that."

My mind was reeling. He knew Bariel? And dated her? "How many girls have you dated before?"

A childish, troubled look takes over Maxon's face. "I don't know… somewhere between fifty and a hundred."

I blanch. He continues, "I noticed that you and _the_ America Singer have the same last names. Any connections?"

"Err, no…. why would you think that?"

He squints at me. "You two also have the same eyes. Ice-blue."

I decide to joke. "I don't know, maybe I'll be the next America Singer?"

Maxon looks at me intently. "I don't care. I like you better than America Singer, anyways." He leans down and kisses me softly. But I can't focus on the astounding smell of his cologne or the sweetness of his lips. Instead, his words replay over and over again in my head. _I like you better than America Singer, anyways._ What would he do when he found that we were the same?

"What makes me better than America Singer?" I just had to know.

"For one, you're always sarcastic and joking. When I'm with her, everything she does seems fake."

As I lay in bed that night, I kept tossing and turning, unable to sleep. _Fake._ That was what I was. America wasn't a disguise I had to wear. She was the real me. But Mer Singer? She didn't exist. She was fake. And forever would be.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass!**

 **TheElite: I can remove the review that you accidentally posted if you want. Just a side note to clear up the confusion: America writes all of her songs, I just added the original songwriter's name to avoid any problems, with copyright and such. Sorry for the confusion. As for the song suggestion,** ** _I will definitely do that._** **I spent a really long time trying to pick out songs that included being someone else, and it fits into what I have planned for the rest of the story. Thanks for the great idea!**

 **Guest: Thank you so much!**

 **maxericaaa: Thanks for enjoying! I've already figured out a way to make Maxon jealous later in the story. Thankfully, it still incorporates nicely with what I've thought out. However, you'll have to wait a little...**

 **MaxericaMoments: Me too! I write things that** ** _I_** **myself would like to read, and though these last few chapters have been disappointing, it's going to get more interesting! I just love the ups and downs of high school life.**

 **Well, I sincerely hope that you enjoy this chapter. It's basically the chapter that leads into the interesting parts, but I don't want to rush it too much.**

* * *

Today, school was a disaster. As I was walking towards my locker, I noticed a paper stuck on every locker. It contained a picture of Maxon and I holding hands as we walked towards the restaurant we went to yesterday and had a caption that read, _School Heartthrob Maxon Schreave caught with Mer Singer! Is our Phantom falling in love with Christine?_

I mentally screamed. Who had seen us? And everywhere I walked, whispers sprung up. People watched everything I did, scrutinizing my every move. I knew what they were talking about. _Is she worthy of our Maxon?_ All the jocks thought. Girls spun rumors, jealousy fueling their spinning wheels. _She's already bedded him. That lucky little slut. And I'm so much prettier than that bitch, anyways!_

I was about to collapse from exhaustion as I sat down for lunch. "Is it true?" Celeste murmurs in a hushed voice.

The flyers? "Yeah, they are. Sorry I didn't tell you guys," I respond apologetically.

"Mer, you little slut!" Celeste squeals playfully. Kriss has disgust and jealousy burning deep in her eyes, and so does Aspen. Elise, Carter, and Marlee just look plain uncomfortable.

"What? I just went on a date with him. Like most of the girls in this school. I don't understand, what is it?"

Kriss pipes up. "You slept with Maxon, didn't you? That's what everyone's talking about."

My eyes pop out. "And all of you believe that?! I can't believe you! Of course, I didn't do anything with him!"

I don't fail to notice everyone's postures slumping in relief. But Aspen isn't happy. "You're dating _him,_ of all people? I thought you had common sense, Mer."

I was just about done with Aspen. " _I'm_ the one with no logic? _You're_ the one bothering me about who I should and shouldn't date! Well, guess what, Aspen, you're _not_ my mother! Heck, even my mother doesn't care about my dating as much as you do!" I yell, not even noticing that the entire cafeteria has gone silent. Ashamed, Aspen hangs his head. Everyone else seemingly shrugs and returns to their food and conversations.

The force of what I said hits me in full force. "Aspen, I didn't mean that. Not to that scale, anyways. I appreciate the fact that you care for me, but don't be overprotective of me. I can take care of myself," I whisper, my voice gentler now.

And so lunch ended on that bad note. My day got progressively better, but that was only because of Maxon. I'm wondering why he makes me feel this way until hands cover my eyes. "Surprise," Maxon says, and I can literally sense him smiling. "You want to come over to my house?"

My eyebrows shoot up. "Definitely!"

I was brought to his car. And long after we arrived at his house—a huge castle-like mansion that _I_ would have a little difficulty affording—he spent the time kissing away all of my stress and troubles of the day. But still, I was nervous as he rang the doorbell for me.

Thankfully, a young maid opened the door. "Mr. Maxon! You're back! And with a _friend_ too! My lady?" A woman with kind, wise eyes that look exactly like Maxon's joins us.

"Hello, I'm Amberly Schreave, Maxon's mom. Who are you, dear?"

I smile, feeling right at home. "I'm Mer. Mer Singer. And you truly must be a saint for raising Maxon," I giggle a little.

She reciprocates my smile. "I know. Here, I have strawberry tarts in the kitchen."

I instantly start salivating. Maxon doesn't fail to see my eagerness. And I saw them—perfect, lush strawberry tarts. I screamed in delight. But that attracted the wrong kind of attention.

A strict-looking man with blond hair and faded blue eyes walked down the stairs and glared at me. "And who are you, young lady?"

I maintain my confidence. "My name's Mer Singer, and you must be Clarkson Schreave, Maxon's father."

He looked me up and down, scrutinizing everything, from my posture to the clothes I wore. "You will _not_ make any loud noise in my house again, or I will see to you."

I shrugged his threat off. What could an old man do to me?

I grabbed a strawberry tart as Maxon dragged me to his room. His room was huge. Bookshelves were against one wall, and pictures were lined up against another wall. "And that was my very unpleasant father," Maxon grumps.

I smirk. "And your father will _see to me_ if I scream again. Wow, I'm petrified."

Panic skirts around Maxon's eyes. "Don't." I nod as if reassuring him. He chuckles and tackles me. I barely hold back a surprised scream. Then, he starts tickling me. I can hardly breathe as I attempt to tickle him back. And when he starts tickling me again, I yelp loudly. _Oh no, America._

The two of us stand up in fear as Clarkson barges into Maxon's room. "Come here, Maxon. I'll teach you a lesson on bringing loud, obnoxious girls into my home."

I forget to control my tongue. "Wait, I thought you were going to deal with me?"

A calculating look passes over Clarkson's face. "Perhaps I'll discipline both of you."

Maxon jumps in hurriedly, "No, that's fine. She stays here. I'll go with you, sir." I don't miss the way he addresses his father. And with a final look at me, Maxon leaves after his father.

I take the time I have alone in Maxon's room to look at his photos, which I assume he took himself. I see a couple pictures of his mom and his friends, but most of them are centered on me. There are pictures of me that I didn't even realize he took, such as a photo of me ice-skating with Aspen, and a picture of me laughing.

It's almost like a shrine dedicated to me: Mer Singer. As soon as I reach this speculation, Maxon walks—more like limps in—, clutching a wooden box. I reach an arm out to hug him, and he winces in pain. "What happened, Maxon?"

"It's nothing."

It looks like I'm not the only one with deep secrets here.

* * *

I want to tell him. The darkest secret I've ever kept. I think long and hard, but I have only one idea: Silvia won't be too happy about this.

Somehow, I want to keep Maxon. He's the best thing that's happened to me ever since I came to Angeles High. And so I start writing a new song.

At school, I have no idea how to approach Maxon. I catch sight of him leaning against his locker, talking casually with Carter. I run up to him. "Hi," I exhale breathlessly.

"Hey," Maxon replies. "You want to go for a walk in the school gardens after school?"

I beam. "Why wouldn't I?" The bell rings, sending students scattering towards their classrooms, including me. I started counting down the minutes until school was out for the day.

"How are you?" Maxon asks me as we stroll past an intricately pruned shrub.

Well, I have a concert to prepare for next week, Aspen just won't let go of me, and Maxon… is Maxon. "I'm fine! What about you?"

"Couldn't have been happier. You want to go to America Singer's concert with me?"

I adopt an apologetic look. "I can't, Maxon. I have… violin lessons that day."

"Oh. It's okay. The time we have here, together, is enough." His face is so eager and energetic, you wouldn't even know that he could break someone's heart.

I grin brightly and kiss him. "I love it when you do that."

He laughs and twirls me around. "What?"

"Look so childish and…enthusiastic." I giggle. "There's a café just around the corner. I need some coffee."

He chuckles again as we walk towards the small café. "I'll pay." The suggestion in his voice masks a hidden command.

Maxon purchases a weak coffee just the way I like it, and a frappe for himself. "You want some?" He motions towards his frappe. I blush a little and take a small sip out of his drink. It was pure heaven, but not to the extent of a strawberry tart.

"There's something I want to tell you." His mouth is smiling, but his eyes are nervous. "I've never felt this way towards someone else. Honestly, Mer? I think I love you."

I froze in shock. And suddenly, there was no one else in the café. It was just Maxon and I. I think back to the way he knew I loved singing, bringing me to my very own recording studio. The way he could make my day so much brighter. And finally, the way he stood up to his father for me. "You know what? I love you, too."

We spent the rest of the day together, finding solace and peace in our newfound trust and love for each other. And I hope it stays this way forever.

* * *

 **I really hope I didn't rush the Maxerica too much. But there's a reason I sped it up a little, don't worry!**

 **Love,** **Owletta**


	10. Chapter Ten

**Disclaimer: All of the characters belong to Kiera Cass... not me!**

* * *

The next week was euphoria. Aspen stopped bothering me when he saw Maxon and me together, laughing over one of Maxon's corny jokes. My friends? They couldn't be happier for me, calling me "the girl who dated Maxon for over a week".

And Maxon? We couldn't be happier together. We would laugh, talk, confess our love for each other, or just simply be together. He had promised a surprise for me today, and I couldn't wait.

Kriss seemed to be happier lately, too. She would go on rambling about a boy that would kiss her in unique ways… I was ecstatic for her.

"His lips are my very own piece of pure joy!" Kriss sighed.

Marlee added on. "No, that can't be right. Carter _is_ pure joy!" We all laughed. It felt satisfying, the way such different people could form lasting bonds throughout their entire lives.

The Phantom of the Opera play was going smoothly, too. The Drama teacher would coo every time Maxon and I rehearsed in front of her. "'You two are the best performers I've ever seen!'"

It continued this way until my concert was staring right at my face. I still had to write another song for tomorrow.

After school was dismissed, I strode down an empty hallway, intending to talk to my Math teacher about the Statistics project I had worked on with Maxon. In an empty classroom, I heard two students talking together. I shrugged them off and continued walking.

"Oh! Mer, you're here." She smiled at me. Funny how the Math teacher goes from giving me detention, to smiling affectionately at me.

"Yeah. I came here to ask about the Statistics project we did."

"Ask away!"

I asked all of the questions I had about the project. She kindly answered them, and I was grateful for her support. As I started to walk down that hallway again, I heard some moaning from a classroom. _It's just some other students making out in an empty classroom after school._ I was about to stroll past them when I caught a brief glimpse of blond hair.

I would know that hair anywhere. The very same hair I would tangle my fingers into. My eyes widened. No, it couldn't be. Maxon loves me. Right?

I adjusted my wig as I cracked open the door a little. There, against the classroom wall, was Maxon. And he was furiously kissing a girl. A girl that wasn't me.

I gasped when I saw her face. _Kriss._ She edged down his pants and attempted to take off his shirt, but he wouldn't let her touch his shirt. I could see where this was going.

I watched, horrified. Maxon and Kriss? This was too awful to be happening. _You knew this was coming, America. Remember how Kriss wanted to be Christine for no apparent reason? Well, that reason was Maxon. How distant he was when he told you that he loved you yesterday? That's because he's used to saying that to Kriss. And you're just the roadblock in their way._

Maxon suddenly stiffened and pushed her aside. "We can't, Kriss. We can't take it this far yet." He straightened his clothes. I took this as my cue to run out of the building. I wanted to run, run far away, away from Maxon and Kriss. And I didn't want to come back.

My phone buzzed, dragging me out of my misery. It was Maxon. I gritted my teeth. He had texted me. _Meet me in the park?_ I kept my answer short. _Okay._

I walked towards the park, carefully arranging a calm and composed façade. _As if you didn't need to be faker, America!_ Maxon was already there, smiling at me. And I hated him. I hated how he acted like nothing was wrong, how he lied to me, how he smiled, how he laughed.

"Hey, Mer. I have a surprise for you!" Maxon sure seemed normal for a liar.

"Well, I don't want it, Schreave." My voice was cold and harsh.

He stumbled back, confused. "What do you mean, Mer? I don't understand."

"I h-hate you, Maxon! I thought you'd changed. But you didn't. Instead, you lied to me, you stomped on my heart, and kept a smile the entire time! H-how could you?!" I spat.

He looked like I'd crushed him. And splintered him into tiny bits. _Good._ "Mer? What did I do wrong? Mer!"

"You really don't know? You don't think _I_ know?! I saw you with Kriss today! Don't play dumb with me."

His eyes widen, and his mouth opens as if he wants to say something, but he closes it. Finally, he speaks. "Mer? I'm sorry; I wasn't thinking right. Please, please—."

I throw unforgiving words at him. "You're just an ass. I don't need any more of your lies, okay? How many times have you lied through your teeth, telling me you loved me? How long has this been going on?!"

"The start of this week," Maxon hangs his head. "Mer, I don't know what I was thinking. Please, I love you!"

The start of this week? The time I was happiest? "I can't believe you! You lied to me, Maxon! And your new girlfriend is a bitch too. She must get her personality from her boyfriend," I snarl, turning my back on him and walking away.

Maxon isn't so keen on me getting away. "Mer!" He grabs me by the wig and tugs, hard.

Everything happened in slow motion. The blonde wig slips off, revealing my recognizable red hair. Maxon stands there like a gaping fish. "Mer?"

Tears start to brim in my eyes. "I'm not Mer. She doesn't exist," And I punch him in the face, watching him stumble back, clutching his bleeding lip. I use the time to snatch my wig and run off.

"Please, Mer!" I hear him calling after me as he tries to run after me. "Mer! I'm sorry!"

But I keep running, running away from my other half, and away from my whole existence. I don't ever look back.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass! All of the songs used in this fanfiction are not mine, either! Only the plot is mine.**

 **Guest (TheElite): Oh, wow! I don't know what to say, but I hope that you feel my overwhelming gratitude. I will use your song suggestion, but I can't change it in any way, for fear that it might violate the copyright policies.**

 **TheElite: That's totally alright! I'm glad that you review the story in the first place.**

 **Guest: Thanks so much! :)**

* * *

I skipped school again. Why wouldn't I? I didn't feel like facing a sulky ex-boyfriend, a cheating, lying, bastard of an ex-boyfriend, and a fake-sweet bitch. I spent the entire morning picking the songs I would sing tonight.

I finished writing my new song, fueled by my heartbreak and anger. Towards the early afternoon, I drove to my performing center in my car. Then, I was dragged to my fancy dressing room and attacked by makeup and costumes.

I couldn't help but think of Maxon. How he would tell me stupid jokes about love. How he would look into my eyes and tell me he loved me. I never knew what heartbreak was until now.

"Miss Singer? You're ready." I faced the mirror. The attendants had done exactly what I had told them to do. Smoky back eyeshadow contrasted against my pale skin, making me look haunted. A matching black dress set the look off.

I wanted to show Maxon that I was done with him. And I was.

Backstage, I turned towards Silvia. She nodded at me. "And… you're live!"

I strolled out onto the stage. People were holding signs with my name on it and screaming. My eyes scanned the swelling crowd, finally finding Maxon. His eyes met mine, and I could see the remorse in them. I might've actually believed his act if not for the brown-haired traitor leaning on his arm.

Kriss caught me looking at her and looked like she was beside herself with excitement. Good. Maxon hadn't told her who I was yet. She flipped her hair and flirtatiously batted her lashes. I focused on something else.

"Good evening! Tonight, I have a couple special songs for you! For those of you who don't know me, I'm America Singer. And singing has always been my lifelong passion. I hope you enjoy my songs as much as I do.

"I'm going to start off with Reflection, which I wrote just a few days ago!" **(A/N: TheElite, here you go! I spent a** ** _lot_** **of time finding one that I liked and described America's predicament. This is also from the "Mulan" movie.)**

 _Reflection (originally by Christina Aguilera)_

 _"Look at me  
You may think you see  
Who I really am  
But you'll never know me  
Every day  
It's as if I play a part  
Now I see  
If I wear a mask  
I can fool the world  
But I cannot fool my heart_

 _Who is that girl I see  
Staring straight back at me?  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside?_

 _I am now  
In a world where I  
Have to hide my heart  
And what I believe in  
But somehow  
I will show the world  
What's inside my heart  
And be loved for who I am_

 _Who is that girl I see  
Staring straight back at me?  
Why is my reflection  
Someone I don't know?  
Must I pretend that I'm  
Someone else for all time?  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside?_

 _There's a heart that must be  
Free to fly  
That burns with a need to know  
The reason why_

 _Why must we all conceal  
What we think, how we feel?  
Must there be a secret me  
I'm forced to hide?  
I won't pretend that I'm  
Someone else for all time  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside?  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside?"_

Cheers erupted. "For my next song, I have Impossible." This was one of the songs I had written after I had caught Maxon cheating on me.

 _Impossible (originally sung by James Arthur or Shontelle)_

 _"I remember years ago  
Someone told me I should take  
Caution when it comes to love  
I did, I did  
And you were strong and I was not  
My illusion, my mistake  
I was careless, I forgot  
I did  
And now when all is done  
There is nothing to say  
You have gone and so effortlessly  
You have won  
You can go ahead tell them_

 _Tell them all I know now  
Shout it from the roof tops  
Write it on the skyline  
All we had is gone now  
Tell them I was happy  
And my heart is broken  
All my scars are open  
Tell them what I hoped would be  
Impossible, impossible  
Impossible, impossible  
Falling out of love is hard  
Falling for betrayal is worst  
Broken trust and broken hearts  
I know, I know  
Thinking all you need is there  
Building faith on love and words  
Empty promises will wear  
I know (I know)  
And now when all is gone  
There is nothing to say  
And if you're done with embarrassing me  
On your own you can go ahead tell them_

 _Tell them all I know now  
Shout it from the roof tops  
Write it on the skyline  
All we had is gone now  
Tell them I was happy  
And my heart is broken  
All my scars are open  
Tell them what I hoped would be  
Impossible, impossible  
Impossible, impossible  
Impossible, impossible_

 _Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)_

 _I remember years ago  
Someone told me I should take  
Caution when it comes to love  
I did_

 _Tell them all I know now  
Shout it from the roof top  
Write it on the skyline  
All we had is gone now  
Tell them I was happy (I was happy)  
And my heart is broken  
All my scars are open  
Tell them what I hoped would be  
Impossible, impossible  
Impossible, impossible  
Impossible, impossible_

 _I remember years ago  
Someone told me I should take  
Caution when it comes to love  
I did."_

I blink back my tears. All the emotions I was experiencing when I wrote this came rushing back. I barely managed to choke out, "The next song I have in store for you is 'Behind These Hazel Eyes." I originally had the word "chocolate" instead of "hazel", but I didn't want any more reminders of Maxon.

 _Behind These Hazel Eyes (originally by Kelly Clarkson)_

 _"Seems like just yesterday_

 _You were a part of me_

 _I used to stand so tall_

 _I used to be so strong_

 _Your arms around me tight_

 _Everything it felt so right_

 _Unbreakable, like nothing could go wrong_

 _Now I can't breathe, no I can't sleep_

 _I'm barely hanging on_

 _Here I am, once again_

 _I'm torn into pieces_

 _Can't deny it, can't pretend_

 _Just thought you were the one_

 _Broken up, deep inside_

 _But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

 _Behind these hazel eyes_

 _I told you everything_

 _Opened up and let you in_

 _You made me feel alright_

 _For once in my life_

 _Now all that's left of me_

 _Is what I pretend to be_

 _So together, but so broken up inside_

 _Cause I can't breathe, no I can't sleep_

 _I'm barely hanging on_

 _Here I am, once again_

 _I'm torn into pieces_

 _Can't deny it, can't pretend_

 _Just thought you were the one_

 _Broken up, deep inside_

 _But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

 _Behind these hazel eyes_

 _Swallow me, then spit me out_

 _For hating you, I blame myself_

 _Seeing you, it kills me now_

 _No, I don't cry on the outside Anymore_

 _Anymore_

 _Here I am, once again_

 _I'm torn into pieces_

 _Can't deny it, can't pretend_

 _Just thought you were the one_

 _Broken up, deep inside_

 _But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

 _Behind these hazel eyes_

 _Here I am, once again_

 _I'm torn into pieces_

 _Can't deny it, can't pretend_

 _Just thought you were the one_

 _Broken up, deep inside_

 _But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

 _Behind these hazel eyes."_

Maxon stood solemnly in the crowd, no doubt breaking down my song into individual segments, trying to figure out what message I was trying to convey. I kept my bright smile. "And for my final song, I present you 'Look What You Made Me Do!'" He was going to see that I could move on. And I would.

 _Look What You Made Me Do (originally by Taylor Swift)_

 _"I don't like your little games  
Don't like your tilted stage  
The role you made me play  
Of the fool, no, I don't like you  
I don't like your perfect crime  
How you laugh when you lie  
You said the gun was mine  
Isn't cool, no, I don't like you (oh!)_

 _But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time  
Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time  
I've got a list of names and yours is in red, underlined  
I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!_

 _Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me  
Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me do_

 _I don't like your kingdom keys  
They once belonged to me  
You ask me for a place to sleep  
Locked me out and threw a feast (what!?)  
The world moves on, another day, another drama, drama  
But not for me, not for me, all I think about is karma  
And then the world moves on, but one thing's for sure (sure)  
Maybe I got mine, but you'll all get yours_

 _But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time (nick of time)  
Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time (I do it all the time)  
I've got a list of names and yours is in red, underlined  
I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!_

 _Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me  
Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me do_

 _I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me  
I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams  
I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me  
I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams  
I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me  
I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams  
I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me  
I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams_

 _Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me  
Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me do_

 _Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me  
Ooh, look what you made me do  
Look what you made me do  
Look what you just made me do  
Look what you just made me do."_

The song definitely wasn't my type, but it portrayed my anger and bitterness after my heartbreak over Maxon faded a little, and I liked writing and singing it. Everyone's cheers were just as loud, but I sensed a slight tension in the room: They had obviously felt the anger rolling off of me as I sang. _Good. Let Maxon know._

"That's all! Next, I have a meet-and-greet where you can get my autograph and talk to me!" This was Silvia's idea. I didn't want to risk having to talk to Maxon again.

I coolly breezed my way down the stage and to a table. There, fan after fan streamed up to me, begging for autographs and information about me.

"Can I have your autograph?"

"What was your life like before you became famous?"

"I want to be you so bad!" I laughed at the last comment. If they really saw what my life was like, they'd scamper off in pity.

Kriss approached me. "America!" She giggled like we were long-lost friends. "Your voice is absolutely beautiful! That's because I have a voice just as heavenly as yours."

I almost punched her in the lip, too. How could she barge up to me and act like she hadn't helped bring me down? I was just about to reply with a nasty remark when Maxon materialized next to her.

I put up all my barriers. "Hello! Would you like an autograph too?" Kriss giggled again and let me sign the back of her shirt. I added a tiny, almost invisible side note: _Why, Kriss?_

After looking into my eyes for what seemed like forever, Maxon said, "Sure." He turned around and I signed his shirt. But instead of writing my signature, I wrote, _You were everything to me. What happened?_

Maxon shooed Kriss off, much to her displeasure. "Mer—America, why did you hide? And I love you," He added quietly.

My cold demeanor was back. "You have no right to talk, you filthy _bastard._ You wandered into this situation yourself. And you lost your chance. I'll never be yours again!" I spat angrily.

His eyes started to water a little. But he didn't cry. Instead, he walked away from me yet again, leaving me desperate for answers and heartbroken once again.

* * *

 **I sincerely hope you liked this! A lot of chapters have been leading up to this one. :)**

 **Love, Owletta**


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Disclaimer: All the characters belong to Kiera Cass!**

 **I'm really sorry, this took a really long time to write, because I just didn't have enough time. But I will never abandon this story!**

 **TheElite: Thanks! And thank you so much for the song suggestion! Your enthusiasm encouraged me to publish this faster...**

 **LadyMadisonSchreave: YES! This is a Maxerica story, 100%. But every love needs a few trials and tribulations...**

 **EnchantedForest3: Aww, thanks! And I'm glad you reviewed. I really appreciate the encouragement. I hope this chapter makes you jump up and down with joy, too.**

* * *

It hurt every time I looked at Maxon. Which was a lot. It was like my heart shattered all over again when we both made eye contact with each other.

The Phantom of the Opera rehearsal was worse. The way he touched me… my nerves were on fire. The auditorium was the largest room in the school, aside from the gym. The opera was written by Andrew Lloyd Weber, but we had adapted it a little.

Marlee squealed, "Oh, Mer! I nearly forgot… my birthday's this Saturday, so I'm inviting you to my house for a small celebration!"

I grinned at her enthusiasm. "That would be wonderful!"

Time passed slowly. Each day dragged on and on until that fateful Saturday arrived. I came to her house early, hoping to get a little extra time with Marlee. As soon as I opened her front door, Celeste attacked me.

"Mer! I haven't talked to you for so long! During lunch, you're always quiet. And Math… you just seem depressed. What happened?"

I shrugged, deciding to tell her the truth. "Maxon and I broke up, Celeste. It's nothing."

I heard a shriek. Marlee was standing in her living room, looking scared. "I'm so sorry, Mer! I didn't know—."

"What is it? Just tell me!"

"I-I invited Maxon over. Kriss suggested it, and I just assumed that you would be happy if he came…"

I couldn't blame her. "It's okay, Marlee. I'll just ignore him." Aspen looked more cheerful after I said that.

My new resolve faded as soon as Maxon walked in, Kriss slung on his arm. I immediately stiffened. Noticing Maxon and Kriss, Elise asked, "What do you want to do?"

Marlee sat up. "I want to play Truth or Dare!" I groaned. Turning to me, Marlee glared. "It's my birthday!"

And so the game began. At first, it started with light, humorous dares, and truths, but the game got more serious. "Mer?" I turned to look at Celeste. "Truth or dare?"

I had to think about it. Finally deciding to avoid spilling secrets, I mumbled, "Dare."

Celeste tapped her chin thoughtfully. "First, blindfold yourself. Stick out your arms, and the first person you touch, you have to kiss."

The moment I was blindfolded, I whipped out my arms zombie-style, smacking someone in the face.

"Ow!" I would recognize his voice a million miles away. Maxon. I nervously untied my blindfold, opening my eyes to see Maxon, face already swelling red.

I looked around me. Celeste looked eager, Elise seemed uncomfortable, Carter was grinning crazily, Marlee had a sympathetic look, Aspen looked a little angry, and Kriss was literally steaming with anger.

I gazed into Maxon's chocolate brown eyes. Once upon a time, I had resented them. Now, I didn't know what to think. Leaning in, I brushed my lips across his, giving him the faintest whisper of a kiss. Like a ghost of what we had before.

I pulled back. Celeste was squealing, and oddly, Carter was too. When Maxon returned to his seat, I saw his best friend slap him on the back.

Glancing at Kriss, I realized that she didn't know that I had seen her with Maxon, just that we had broken up. "Truth or dare, Kriss?"

"Truth." She wanted to stay on the safe side, apparently.

I was already formulating an idea. "Who was the person you last kissed, and when?"

She froze up. I could tell that she was thinking of the day I found out that Maxon had cheated on me, and so was I. "Erm… it was a stranger at the bar I went to last night."

She was lying. From the way she wouldn't look at anyone in the eye, she had lied to our faces. Elise exclaimed disgustedly, "I thought you had a boyfriend, Kriss. I didn't perceive you as that type of person."

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise and horror. "I b-broke up with him." She appeared to be collecting herself as she looked towards Maxon. My stomach started churning. "Maxon, truth or dare?" she asked sweetly.

"Dare," he shrugged. I could read Kriss's mind. She was either thinking of making him kiss her, or do something else with her.

The devil's face lit up. "I dare you to spend seven minutes in heaven with me." At this, Marlee started whispering to Carter, Elise just shook her head, and Maxon even seemed to recoil in disbelief.

Even Celeste didn't encourage this activity.

Aspen ushered the two of them into Marlee's storage closet. Probably seeing my devastated expression, Marlee waved me over. "I'm not sure if you'll want to watch, but I have a peephole in this specific closet. It's the reason why I allowed the two of them into this closet. If you want, you can monitor them."

I was moved. Marlee was truly the best friend anyone could ask for. And against my will, I looked inside, having not heard anything from inside.

What I saw broke my heart. Again. But this time, I didn't cry. Instead, I emotionlessly watched Maxon straddle Kriss, kissing her like I'd never been kissed before. How foolish had I been? Deceiving myself into believing that Maxon would want someone like me? A temperamental, sometimes selfish, wild girl who couldn't be restrained?

After a horrible seven minutes, Maxon and Kriss walked out, clothes perfectly straight, hair completely neat. No wonder they could fool me for so long.

After several more rounds, Carter called on me. "Mer… truth or dare?"

I said dully, "Dare." The truth could only destroy.

"Kiss… no, make out with Aspen for a minute." I scrunched up my face for a brief second.

Without meaning to, my eyes flicked to Maxon. He leaned back against Kriss, almost protectively. The pain burst through my chest again, and I pulled Aspen close to me, kissing him harshly. No matter how close I pressed against him, the pain wouldn't lessen.

As soon as my minute was over, I pushed him away. I felt bad that I had just used him for my own purposes and planned to apologize later. When I looked back at Maxon, he was gone.

* * *

The moment Marlee dismissed us from her house, wishing to be alone with Carter, I drove to my recording studio in my new, plain car, which helped me fit in more.

I didn't even bother to greet Silvia. Instead, I ran to the restroom, heaving up what little lunch I'd eaten. After wiping myself off, I walked out to find Silvia. Once I spotted her near my practice room, she passed a form to me.

My stomach dropped. A request form, asking to hear me sing. I tested out my voice. "Hi, Silvia. Who is this?"

She gave me a stern look. "I'm certain you would prefer to read it yourself; it's quite personal."

Bracing myself for another crazed fan, I looked at the paper. An elegant, scrawled cursive popped out at me. They had written an entire letter to me!

 _America,_

 _I know you hate me right now. And quite frankly, I hate myself too, for what I did to you. You wouldn't believe me when I said that I was sorry. But I am, and forever will be. Because I love you, America. You are the world to me. I don't care if you're a world-famous pop star or a normal, average girl. One day, I hope you'll be able to forgive me. Maybe then, I'll finally forgive myself for hurting you._

 _Maxon._

A silent tear dripped down my cheek. A quick look at the application showed me that he'd written this mess yesterday. Remembering that Silvia would be profiting from this event, I nodded and accepted his request to hear me sing.

"There's another thing. Your father has suffered from a heart attack. The funeral is tomorrow. I'm incredibly sorry," Silvia reported sorrowfully.

More tears running down my face, I silently wished for a world where I got to say good-bye to my father. _Daddy…_ Celeste had lost her mom. Now I know how it felt.

Using my last few moments of peace, I ran towards my favorite room in the entire recording studio: my room of memories. It had pictures of my family, pictures of me once I became known to the world. Little notes that my old lover had given me.

I still had no clue of who he was. Just that during eighth grade, after my first kiss, we had begun visiting each other in the dark, outside of a small café. And one day, he stopped visiting the café to see me. Miserable, I kept my knowledge of him tucked into my heart.

In my little room of mementos, I could find peace. In a glass case was my first violin, which my father had bought for me when I was six. Another one contained my first guitar. And above that was a picture of my family cheering for me at my first concert. Remembering my dad's death, I started weeping quietly. He would never call me kitten, or help me with my art ever again.

I heard footsteps. I spun around, finding myself standing in front of Maxon. "Hey," he whispered, his voice hoarse. As his eyes scanned my personal haven, he noticeably paled.

"Well, would you like me to sing? Or would you rather have us discuss our issues?" I cleared my throat.

Maxon's eyes, which I had grown to love—resent, softened. "Talk, please."

I tried to maintain my poise. "Let me start. I fall in love with you, and you cheat on me. With Kriss, my friend, of all people. Every time I looked at you during Marlee's celebration, you were all nice and cuddly with her. And during that seven minutes of heaven, when I was watching you—,"

"Wait. You _watched_ us?" Maxon ran a hand through his hair and started pacing.

"I sure as hell saw you getting along nicely with Kriss! Can you imagine how crushed I felt? How much I wanted to _die_ when everyone looked sympathetically at me?!" I was screaming now, tears streaming down my cheeks like waterfalls.

His voice was cold. "You need to stop being dramatic. We were just kissing, that's all."

I slapped him. "I'm overreacting, now? Is this not a normal reaction from a girl who just got cheated on, watched her ex-boyfriend make out with her ex-friend, and just learned that her father had died?"

Maxon didn't even spare sympathy. "You know what? Wallow in your miserable life. I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote that junk on the request. Kriss is a much better choice than you. You're arrogant, impulsive, rude, and emotional!"

It was as if he was cracking my heart with each word until he finally broke it. I couldn't even find the words to speak. Instead, I allowed my body to carry me away. And I feared that I would never be whole again.

* * *

 **Umm, I hope you liked this? I know it's not a very long chapter, but I kept writing when I was supposed to go to sleep. It was worth it, though. I know I just jumbled a bunch of randomness around, but hopefully, it doesn't seem like it.**

 **Love, Owletta**


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Disclaimer: All of the characters belong to Kiera Cass!**

* * *

Dressed in a floor-length black dress, I donned a black veil to cover my tear-stained face. Every time I thought of Maxon, I was left gasping for air and crying. I ran a hand along my father's casket, silently saying goodbye.

Dad had given me my first instruments, helped me launch my singing career, supported me in every concert and event, and had encouraged me the entire time. But I didn't cry again during the entire ceremony, not even when he was lifted into the ground and buried. No amount of tears could bring him back. Ever.

* * *

By now, the entire school knew that Maxon was dating Kriss. During lunch, Kriss stopped sitting next to us, instead sitting with Celeste's old friends. She even started wearing revealing clothes, always making sure that Maxon got the full view of her cleavage.

And me? I became an empty shell. I still attended Drama classes, but I was purely acting during rehearsals, with no emotions put into my performance. I lost interest in everything except for singing.

The night of our Phantom of the Opera play arrived. I feigned illness, allowing Kriss to play the part of Christine instead. I didn't even stay to watch the musical.

Kriss may have become a slut and a bitch, but there was no mistaking the love in her eyes whenever she looked at Maxon. _Let him go,_ my conscience said. So I did. I let him go. Forever. Because he deserved someone better than me, a fake who could only pretend and act. And so I sealed off my heart.

For Winter Break, I headed back to Carolina without my family. I plopped on my blonde wig, tucking every red strand away. And when I looked into the mirror in my hotel room, I didn't recognize myself.

I didn't even look like Mer Singer. My eyes were hollow, cheeks sunken, hair flat and dull. I was just an echo of my former self. Deciding that I would risk it, I tore off my wig. Even my normally bright red hair was no longer vibrant. Instead, it hung limply.

I wanted him. I wanted his comfort, his warmth. I ached for Maxon, but he wasn't here. I dismally walked to a small café. Only one other person was there, sitting at a table with an untouched latte.

 _Maxon._ He looked up at me, and a wide range of emotions flitted across his face—hostility, grief, pain, anger. He snarled, "What are you doing here? This is _my_ hometown."

All of my happiness at seeing him flew away. "This is my hometown too. I lived here until my sophomore year of high school," I dully reply, before turning away to buy coffee.

The pain was becoming too much for me to bear. I brushed my sallow hair, threw on a short black dress, laced on some complicated heels, grabbed my phone, and headed towards the nearby club. Exhausted, I bought a bottle of beer.

I don't know how many bottles of beer I drank. Somewhere in my hazy mind, drinking seemed like the solution to all my problems and pain. **(A/N: I don't encourage drinking! Drinking is NOT a solution to any of your problems.)**

And then I spotted a flash of blonde hair. Maxon! He was holding a shot of vodka, eyes rimmed red. Why was he here? Why hadn't I noticed him before? Maxon had obviously been drinking. A lot, judging by his eyes.

Suddenly dizzy, I took a seat on a couch. My splintered heart leaped when I saw Maxon heading towards the couch I was at.

"Maxon!" I slurred. "Why are you here?"

His voice wasn't slurred like mine, but it was heavy. "America? Look, I don't want to talk to you. You need to control yourself."

He opened his mouth as if to say something else, but I smashed my lips to his, kissing him roughly. Maybe it was the alcohol or something, but he kissed me back. His warm, comforting hands slid under my shirt while I feverishly attempted to take off his shirt.

Maxon pulled back, his hands at his sides again. He shook his head sadly, as if not believing that I had been degraded to this state. His voice was stiff again. "You can't do this, America. I have a girlfriend." With that, he left. The last I saw of him was when he called for a taxi.

* * *

Months passed like this when we got back to school. Maxon being cold and indifferent, Kriss being another person, my friends worried about me, and me empty.

Feeling tired, I walked to the café and step in line to order a cup of coffee. Horrified, I hear giggling. Kriss. "Oh, Maxon! This is so sweet! Thank you for bringing me here."

Much to my horror, Maxon and Kriss materialize next to me in line. I quickly order my coffee and am about to take a sip out of it before Kriss snatches it out of my hand, pouring it on me. After a quick check ensuring that my wig was still in place, I tug her brown hair hard, nearly ripping it off her head.

Ignoring the warm coffee staining my shirt, I punch Maxon, too, for good measure. Last time I punched him, he didn't do anything. But now, he rears his arm back, punching me in the face too.

Maxon shoves me to the ground, and shocked, I fall. My head hits a table before I crash to the hard, unforgiving ground. Me still lying on the floor, Kriss angrily stomps on my face and chest, bringing me into even more pain.

Pressing a hand to my bleeding nose while adjusting my wig, I run out of the café, tears staining my bloodied cheeks. I ran into the local park, looking for a safe place, a haven. I finally end up climbing a tree, perching on the highest branch, where I could see everything.

Ripping my shirt sleeve off, I use the fabric to bandage the little cuts Kriss gave me and to staunch the blood running from my nose. At least it wasn't broken. I couldn't believe that I had physically gotten into a fight with Kriss and Maxon. How far we came, from people who cared about each other to adversaries.

From my branch, I watched Maxon head towards my tree and sit down on the bench beneath it. So he decided to skip school today too. He had a growing bruise on his jaw, courtesy of being punched. After a while, he abruptly stood up and left.

The moment he was out of sight, I scampered down the tree, eager to go back home.

"What were you doing in a tree?" Maxon bites out. _Oh._ He hadn't left the park.

Why was he treating me like this? What had I done? "To get away from _you._ "

A brief second after I said that, Maxon's eyes portray slight anguish. But the moment is gone as soon as it came.

I didn't want to deal with his game of charades anymore. "Don't you ever get it? _I hate you._ Why can't you leave me alone?"

His eyes were cold, hard orbs of chocolate. "Don't worry, the feeling is mutual."

With those six words, I felt broken. And as I ran away from him, I realized that my heart hadn't only been shattered, it was no longer mine. Because it had belonged to Maxon from the moment I laid my eyes on him.

* * *

 **Well, I hope you enjoyed!**

 **Love, Owletta**


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass! And none of the songs mentioned in this chapter are mine.**

 **Virtue01: Don't worry, they'll find out soon enough... Thanks so much for reviewing!**

 **alunarselectedreader: I'm updating again! Sorry for the long wait. Thanks again for liking this!**

 **TheElite: Okaaay... To be honest, I spent days wondering how to reply to you. I have to admit, it did make me a bit sad when I read your review, but I actually appreciate the criticism. To know that I've done something wrong is better than being lied to. I will incorporate some of your suggestions into the story, and you can see some of that in this chapter. I'm sorry that you found the last few chapters unsatisfactory, though.**

 **Guest: Thanks so much!**

 **TheElite: I'm so sorry that you didn't like my new updates. But I'll take your suggestion! :)**

 **Guest: Thank you! I definitely plan on adding chapters!**

 **Booklovin'03: Yay! Glad to see that you like it! Thanks for the support!**

 **Booklovin'03: Yes, I know that Maxon is a jerk... sorry about that. He's just hurt that America is no longer his.**

 **maxericaaa: I'm still taking your suggestion of making Maxon jealous! It's going to happen in later chapters. Thanks for the enthusiasm!**

 **hennah: I am!**

* * *

Turns out, Silvia planned an impromptu concert for me, knowing that there was something bothering me. I carefully pick out my songs and quietly rehearse in my head as attendants dust makeup on my face.

"Miss Singer? You're ready." Last time I had a concert, I was a broken girl with an even more broken heart. I'm still that girl. But maybe, over time, I can get over it.

All my thoughts of Maxon flew out of my head when I stepped onto the stage, fans cheering me on. And I knew: Even if Maxon didn't love me, there were other people who cared for me.

"Hello, everyone! Tonight, I'll be singing quite a few songs, more than usual. I hope you can find the meaning in the songs I've written. I'll be starting off with one of my new songs, Stand in the Rain." I wanted to start off with a sadder song, and slowly transition the mood between my songs.

 _Stand in the Rain (by Superchick)_

 _She never slows down.  
She doesn't know why  
but she knows that when she's all alone,  
feels like its all coming down  
She won't turn around  
The shadows are long and she fears if she cries that first tear,  
the tears will not stop raining down_

 _So stand in the rain_  
 _Stand your ground_  
 _Stand up when it's all crashing down_  
 _You stand through the pain_  
 _You won't drown_  
 _And one day, what's lost can be found_  
 _You stand in the rain_

 _She won't make a sound  
Alone in this fight with herself  
and the fears whispering if she stands she'll fall down  
She wants to be found  
The only way out is through everything she's running from  
wants to give up and lie down._

 _So stand in the rain_  
 _Stand your ground_  
 _Stand up when it's all crashing down_  
 _You stand through the pain_  
 _You won't drown_  
 _And one day, what's lost can be found_  
 _You stand in the rain_

 _So stand in the rain  
Stand your ground  
Stand up when it's all crashing down  
Stand through the pain  
You won't drown  
And one day, what's lost can be back_

 _So stand in the rain_  
 _Stand your ground_  
 _Stand up when it's all crashing down_  
 _You stand through the pain_  
 _You won't drown_  
 _And one day, what's lost can be found_  
 _You stand in the rain."_

It was my way of describing my turmoil over the last few months. I wanted my song to provide hope to others in my predicament. "My next song is White Horse."

 _White Horse (by Taylor Swift)_

 _"Say you're sorry  
That face of an angel  
Comes out just when you need it to  
As I paced back and forth all this time  
'Cause I honestly believed in you  
Holding on  
The days drag on  
Stupid girl,  
I should have known, I should have known_

 _That I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down  
Now it's too late for you  
And your white horse, to come around_

 _Maybe I was naive,  
Got lost in your eyes  
And never really had a chance  
My mistake I didn't know to be in love  
You had to fight to have the upper hand  
I had so many dreams  
About you and me  
Happy endings  
Now I know_

 _I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down  
Now it's too late for you  
And your white horse, to come around_

 _And there you are on your knees,  
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me  
Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry_

 _'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale  
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well  
This is a big world, that was a small town  
There in my rear view mirror disappearing now  
And it's too late for you and your white horse  
Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now_

 _Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa  
Try and catch me now  
Oh, it's too late  
To catch me now."_

I smiled to myself as I finished. The concert lights above me shone even more luminously, and my heart couldn't be beaming more radiantly. Fans cheered me on, showering me with their endless support. "Now, that's my last 'sad' song for the rest of the night! The next song I have in store for you is Somebody That I Used to Know."

Somebody That I Used to Know (by Gotye)

 _"Now and then I think of when we were together  
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die  
Told myself that you were right for me  
But felt so lonely in your company  
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember_

 _You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness  
Like resignation to the end, always the end  
So when we found that we could not make sense  
Well you said that we would still be friends  
But I'll admit that I was glad it was over_

 _But you didn't have to cut me off  
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing  
And I don't even need your love  
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough  
No, you didn't have to stoop so low  
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number  
I guess that I don't need that though  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know_

 _Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over  
But had me believing it was always something that I'd done  
But I don't wanna live that way  
Reading into every word you say  
You said that you could let it go  
And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know_

 _But you didn't have to cut me off  
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing  
And I don't even need your love  
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough  
No, you didn't have to stoop so low  
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number  
I guess that I don't need that though  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
Somebody (I used to know)  
(Somebody) Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
Somebody (I used to know)  
(Somebody) Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
I used to know, that I used to know, I used to know somebody."_

I shout, "And for our next song, I have Fight Song!" It had an encouraging tune, with astounding motivation behind each beat.

 _Fight Song (by Rachel Platten)_

 _"Like a small boat  
On the ocean  
Sending big waves  
Into motion  
Like how a single word  
Can make a heart open  
I might only have one match  
But I can make an explosion_

 _And all those things I didn't say  
Wrecking balls inside my brain  
I will scream them loud tonight  
Can you hear my voice this time?_

 _This is my fight song  
Take back my life song  
Prove I'm alright song  
My power's turned on  
Starting right now I'll be strong  
I'll play my fight song  
And I don't really care if nobody else believes  
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me_

 _Losing friends and I'm chasing sleep  
Everybody's worried about me  
In too deep  
Say I'm in too deep (in too deep)  
And it's been two years I miss my home  
But there's a fire burning in my bones  
Still believe  
Yeah, I still believe_

 _And all those things I didn't say  
Wrecking balls inside my brain  
I will scream them loud tonight  
Can you hear my voice this time?_

 _This is my fight song  
Take back my life song  
Prove I'm alright song  
My power's turned on  
Starting right now I'll be strong  
I'll play my fight song  
And I don't really care if nobody else believes  
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me_

 _A lot of fight left in me_

 _Like a small boat  
On the ocean  
Sending big waves  
Into motion  
Like how a single word  
Can make a heart open  
I might only have one match  
But I can make an explosion_

 _This is my fight song  
Take back my life song  
Prove I'm alright song  
My power's turned on  
Starting right now I'll be strong (I'll be strong)  
I'll play my fight song  
And I don't really care if nobody else believes  
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me_

 _Know I've still got a lot of fight left in me."_

The cheering started before I even finished the last line. "I'm not done yet!" I smiled playfully at my audience. "For you, I have one last song. This isn't like all my other songs, instead, it's a song meant to encourage _you._ I hope it motivates others like me. Presenting… Firework!"

 _Firework (by Katy Perry)_

 _"Do you ever feel like a plastic bag  
Drifting through the wind  
Wanting to start again_

 _Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin  
Like a house of cards  
One blow from caving in_

 _Do you ever feel already buried deep  
Six feet under scream  
But no one seems to hear a thing_

 _Do you know that there's still a chance for you  
'Cause there's a spark in you_

 _You just gotta ignite the light  
And let it shine  
Just own the night  
Like the Fourth of July_

 _'Cause baby you're a firework  
Come on show 'em what you're worth  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
As you shoot across the sky_

 _Baby you're a firework  
Come on let your colors burst  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
You're gonna leave 'em fallin' down down down_

 _You don't have to feel like a waste of space  
You're original, cannot be replaced  
If you only knew what the future holds  
After a hurricane comes a rainbow_

 _Maybe a reason why all the doors are closed  
So you can open one that leads you to the perfect road  
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow  
And when it's time, you'll know_

 _You just gotta ignite the light  
And let it shine  
Just own the night  
Like the Fourth of July_

 _'Cause baby you're a firework  
Come on show 'em what you're worth  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
As you shoot across the sky_

 _Baby you're a firework  
Come on let your colors burst  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
You're gonna leave 'em fallin' down down down_

 _Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon  
It's always been inside of you, you, you  
And now it's time to let it through_

 _'Cause baby you're a firework  
Come on show 'em what you're worth  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
As you shoot across the sky_

 _Baby you're a firework  
Come on let your colors burst  
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
You're gonna leave 'em fallin' down down down  
Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon  
Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon."_

When I finished singing, I couldn't help but feel the joy possessing me. It streamed down upon me in waves, radiating off my face and reflecting on the faces of the crowd. "Thank you so much for attending! Have a wonderful rest of the evening. Don't forget to stop by me for autographs!"

And as I said those words, my thoughts accidentally strayed to Maxon. It felt different, though, thinking about him. Once I pinpointed what was strange, I realized that my heart wasn't shattering. It didn't splinter even more. And only a strong ache remained.

Maybe I could move on.

Clinging on to that optimistic thought, I nearly skipped to my reception table. And I felt strong. Able to accomplish anything.

Those beliefs wavered a bit when I watched Maxon approach me, Kriss slung over his arm. I kept my composure. After all, our last encounter wasn't pleasant. "Maxon! Wonderful to see you. With a lovely girlfriend, too!" I lied through my gritted teeth.

But I noticed something about Kriss as she gazed adoringly at Maxon. It wasn't a lie. _She loved Maxon._ And I would accept that. He deserved someone who could love him deeply, not someone like me.

Maxon tensed up. I could tell, from the way his back straightened by a microscopic centimeter, and his arms going stiff. "Kriss, your autograph."

Kriss bounded up to me. "I know that if we knew each other really well, we'd be the best of friends." She let me sign her shirt, again. I could see my last signature, but the doofus hadn't even noticed my previous little message to her.

I smiled politely, my patience wearing thin. "I'm sure that we'd be great friends. I hope to see you at my next concert!" My smile stretches wide, completely and utterly fake, barely masking my request for her to leave.

With a humph, Kriss walks away, dragging Maxon with her. He glances back at me, almost longingly, but I brush it off like one would a fly.

I'm over him.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, they all belong to Kiera Cass!**

 **EnchantedForest3: Me too! I ship Maxerica with all my heart, but they need some time apart to see that they can't live without each other. Thanks for the support! :)**

 **SparkyGurly227: Yes, she is! Showing others that she's strong instantly strengthens her character, and sort of makes up for America's deterioration in the last couple chapters. Thank you so much for reviewing, though!**

 **LadyMadisonSchreave: I have to agree with you, I just didn't like Kriss. Even though she was sweet and all, she was almost chosen by Maxon, and that makes me dislike her. Maxerica will return, though! And thanks for the encouragement!**

 **maxericaaa: Of course she's not completely over him. No one can forget their lover that fast! There will be jealousy on Maxon's part _very_ soon. And here's a new update for you!**

 **Booklovin'03: That's so true! The best revenge is just ignoring someone. But, unfortunately, America just can't stay away from Maxon... Thank you so much for your consistent support, though!  
**

* * *

The cafeteria was noisy, but I couldn't go outside to eat. Kriss and her cronies were sitting at the same table as my friends and I were, making jokes about me. Walking away would be like admitting defeat.

Marlee talked quietly to Carter, casting glances my way every now and then. Aspen was as unreadable as ever. "You seem so much more alive now, Mer!" Celeste gushed. "Before, you were like a stone. No matter how much people poked and prodded at your feelings, you did nothing. But now, you're energetic and eager to do something!"

I halfheartedly nodded along. I found myself getting lost in my memories as I stared into space.

 _Flashback:_

 _Kota had spent over a year on his sculpting project. And it was totally worth it. To say that it was magnificent was an understatement. When it was sold, Kota became famous. He hauled in lots of money. I couldn't have been happier for my brother. He was always hard-working, and he deserved the reward._

 _But our family was struggling. I called him. He was always the loving, caring, older brother. "Kota?"_

 _On the other end, his voice is slick. "Ames?"_

 _"Yeah. Mom and Dad refuse to admit it, but we're struggling with money. There's never enough. We need your help, Kota," I begged. What would happen to Gerad, who was barely a few years old?_

 _"You think I'd let you steal my money? Forget it, Ames. Go beg to someone else. I'm no longer part of your pathetic family." Kota keeps a cool demeanor, completely brushing off his family for his own selfish needs._

 _Tears leak out of my eyes. "Please! What about Gerad and May? They're too young to be suffering from hunger! Kota, you're better than this—," I pleaded with him for what seemed like hours, but nothing swayed him._

 _He cut off the call, leaving me devastated. I had lost a brother._

The short series of memories only played for about a minute before Elise dragged me out of my thoughts. "Mer? Why weren't you at the Phantom of the Opera play? I mean, you must've had a reason."

That had completely slipped out of my mind. "I fell sick," I remember it so clearly. I was still recovering from my heartbreak, Kriss would want to be Christine so much more, and I didn't want to look at Maxon.

Elise said simply, "Oh." I tear my thoughts away from Maxon and Kriss. They're whispering, causing another memory to surface in my mind.

 _Flashback:_

 _The party was wild, with bright multicolored lights and a disco ball. The refreshment table had multiple servings of beer and other types of alcohol, along with a punch bowl and water. I didn't know that eighth-graders were already drinking alcohol._

 _I weaved my way through the crowd, looking for my friend Ashley, who'd brought me here. I finally spotted her dancing drunkenly with her boyfriend, so I backed off into a lounge with a cup of punch._

 _Other couples were everywhere around the place, kissing and swaying to the music. I felt sort of excluded, almost isolated. Carefully observing my surroundings, I downed my punch._

 _A boy stumbled over to the couch I was sitting at. I couldn't make out most of his features, but he had perfect, slicked-back blonde hair. I turned my head towards him. "Are you okay?" My voice came out strange._

 _He blinked rapidly and mumbled, "I feel out of control, but I only drank the punch here." His speech is slurred, but I can tell that he's confused._

 _A beam of light hit him, only lighting up his gorgeous chocolate eyes. I didn't know why, but I kept staring at him._

 _The boy holds my stare. Suddenly, impulsively, he crashes his lips on mine. I get lost in the softness of his lips and run my fingers through his hair, messing it up. Oh. So, the punch was spiked. I ignore those thoughts as he pulls me close to him._

 _What am I doing? No matter what Bariel and Olivia say, I'm not a slut. Someone like him probably has a girlfriend._

 _I pull away, much to our disappointment. I blurt stupidly, "You're gorgeous."_

 _He laughs, but it isn't drunken laughter. "And you're beautiful." At those words, I lose control and kiss him again._

 _I had always imagined my first kiss to be in the rain, with a boy I loved. Not with a drunk, handsome stranger during an eighth-grade party. But that didn't make it any less special._

I focused on the present again when Kriss started whispering to her friend loudly, pointing her finger at me.

I guess that should have been my warning.

Kriss noticed me watching her and said smugly, "Jealous that Maxon likes me and not you?"

I snapped, "At least he doesn't love you." At this, Kriss's eyes enlarge with outrage.

I discreetly peek at Maxon. He's staring at me intently, trying to figure out what was going on. Bolder, I stand up and walk past Kriss, making a point to smirk at her a little. That was my fatal mistake.

In a flash, she lunges towards me, hands reaching up to my head. Before I could recover, she brutally tugged my hair.

It happened excruciatingly slow for me. My wig slid off easily, exposing my horribly bright red hair. Free of their constraint, my hair flowed out, down my back. Without my wig, I was as recognizable as the sun: After all, who couldn't recognize America Singer?

A tense silence ensued. My friends stared at me with disbelief and shock, which basically mirrored everyone else's expressions. Only Maxon looked slightly undeterred. Kriss just stood there like a gaping fish, not believing that _I_ was the same girl who she'd promised would be best friends with her.

In that instant, people started whipping their phones out, taking pictures, filming videos, texting their friends. Unable to bear the weight of my secret being exposed, I ran out of the school, not wanting to face the questions.

But I couldn't forget my friends' faces when they saw me for who I really was. Betrayed, shocked, hurt that I hadn't told them. They must hate me. Because who could ever love a fake?

* * *

 **I hope you liked the reveal!**

 **Love, Owletta**


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